Category Archives: how to change your thought patterns

Maybe You Are Searching Among The Branches For What Only Appears In Appears In The Branches.

As we are searching fo things in life, sometimes we are only touching the surface of what we need. You search for the growth on the branches, life exists there, not knowing that the true health and state of those Branches are fed by what is invisible to the eye, it’s nourished by the roots that lay underneath.

Just like us, we may search for external happiness in a partner and material things. But the true source of happiness comes from deep inside.

I an the vine you are the Branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit, apart from me you can do nothing. If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. (John: 15-5)

I love this verse it really explains so much. The vine is the root of a tree, and the branches are us.

After every leaf falls off the tree in your life what is left? The roots are they rotten roots or are they rotten roots or connected and flowing. Even if those ranches break and die, if the root system is healthy the a new tree will grow. Just as some trees once they are dead, a new tree will grow. Underneath the surface there is life. Look to the roots in your life. What really gives us life. What really sustains you when all else fades away.

How To Love Well

Loving and being loved well is the primary need of every human. Yet many people don’t feel loved. That’s a problem.

The most important thing in life is to learn how to give love out and to let it come in.

Morri Schwartz

There are many reasons people don’t feel loved but one is a lack of loving well. We can do things for people thinking we’re showing them love and be wrong.

What we think is a great demonstration of love may not say love to them all.

We might be trying to love them using our idea of the golden rule.

For Example: you wish someone would send flowers you flowers to show love. But then they don’t respond how you expected. They’re polite and say thank you but the joy you were trying to communicate wasn’t there. You ask yourself what’s the problem? You might feel angry if you went through a lot of trouble.

Your speaking you’re love language, but not theirs. Because we’re all different we process information differently, even our perspective of love.

Learn a new language:

To love a person you’ll need to speak their love language. There are five love landscapes.

They are:

  • Words of Affirmation
  • Acts of Service
  • Receiving Gifts
  • Quality Time
  • Physical Touch

When you look at this list certain people may pop into your head right away. Can you think what makes them feel love?

All of them are wonderful sometimes we don’t just pick one or two. The truth is this love language is true.

To love a person well you need to know their love language.

Words of Affirmation

Tell then you believe in them when they are nervous about something.

Remind them how amazing they are if they are down.

Encourage them to continue when something is difficult.

Acts of Service

When actions speak louder than words. The giving kind assistance and help.

Offer to help with the dishes, fold the laundry, take the garbage out, or women help them with handing tool to them when their working on the family cars.

Calling to check on someone when they live alone, or someone going through a tough time, or recovering from surgery.

Receiving Gifts

Symbols of love and affection. It’s not the cost, it’s the thought behind it. The Gift says I was thinking of you when I bought this because I love you.

  • Pick up a souvenir when you go someplace new.
  • Send some flowers or give them produce from your garden. Pick up something ridiculous just because you know they’ll get a kick out of it.

Quality Time.

Expressing affection with undivided undistracted attention. Talking and active listening speak love loudly.

  • Set aside time to spend together often.
  • Have a day for deeper conversation on the phone or in person.
  • If you are living far away
  • Use FaceTime, Skype, or zoom.

Physical Touch

  • Give then a neck or back massage
  • .
  • Sit next to them an lean on them while watching a movie or a sunset.
  • Play footsie, or tickle monster.

These are to help us, don’t get hung up on them.

Knowing how to love someone is more powerful than the best intention.

Alex Blackwell

Communicating

Communication is one of the major parts of love. Without it a love cannot hold on.

We can learn our love language and let people know what makes us feel loved also.

Your Life Won’t Change Until You Change Your Perspective

You are what you think.

If you are only thinking about your problems and sorrows. That’s exactly what you are going to attract in your life.

Change your perspective and start thinking about solutions and opportunities, you are sending vibrations to attract an abundance of them.

It isn’t until I realized this and started changing my perspective that my life changed.

Just like you are what you eat, you are what you think.

Instead of complaining about all the things you don’t have be happy for the things you have.

Yesterday my car started having problems. I took it to a mechanic and he told me I had worse problems than I thought I had. I wouldn’t have believed him, but he is a close friend.

I was a total wreck yesterday I was stressed out and caused myself a migraine. I have to depend on my car for the type of wages and helping people.

So of course I did something irrational. I got drunk. Its been probably 10 years since I had a drink. Not a wise choice on my part but, I did it and I probably won’t do it again for many years.

Yesterday my perspective was “Oh no what am I going to do now?” Well to answer my own question, I’m going to find out what all is wrong with it, (put an amount on it. And work on getting it fixed.

We all accumulate a lot off negativity in our lives. And when all that negativity fills up our life it can turn disastrous. People, relationships, personal life, Careers, routine, broken things whether it be cars and something wrong with our houses. Everything goes toxic but we tend not to do anything about it.

Say there’s a BMW on the road and behind it was a Suzuki behind it, then there was a couple on bikes and a few kids and a guy in a wheelchair trying to crossing the road. This story has 4 characters the BMW, the Suzuki, the bike a guy in a wheelchair, the couple on the bike were seduced by the want of BMW, the guy in the Suzuki was eyeing the some other car, and the guy in the wheelchair was looking at the kids. One can easily feel the want or desire in his eyes that he just wanted to walk.

In that moment, all there worries diminished. They all wanted something they didn’t have.

We always have a choice in how we view things.

Have you ever looked at unfortunate circumstances in your life and thought your going to get through this because you don’t have a choice? Easy one of us has many choices and we are exercising them everyday, every minute, and every second.

Let’s breakdown the different choices we make on a regular day:

Choice #1. You wake up at 6:00 AM so you can reach your work on time.

Choice #2. You take a vehicle or a bus, or a cab.

Choice #3. You take on extra work load to prove your competence, you already have a lot of work.

Choice #4. You help your kids with their homework despite being tired.

Choice #5. You get ready for bed at night and start thinking about your dreams when you fall asleep.

While it may not be in our hands to choose whatever happens in our life. The way we see it and react to it can make all the difference.

You can’t change the cards your dealt with, but you can change how you play them.

Randy Pausch

You have the choice to be happy or sad, complain or express gratitude, smile or frown, be productive or procrastinate, be a victim or a victim. Just remember that you always have a choice and it begins by changing the way you look at things happening in your life.

The best way to change your life is to take ownership and act.

If you want anything, act.

Nothing is going to change if you aren’t willing to change yourself. Things aren’t going to change on their own. Be confident about yourself and take a leap of faith. Be a little proactive rather than being a victim by your situation.

Your Response To Mistakes Defines You

We all make mistakes. We focus on the wrong things. We pursue goals at all costs. We teeter on ethical and moral cliffs. We get too fat down that slippery slope. We steal. We cheat. We lie. We deceive others. We deceive ourselves. We don’t open ourselves up yo our friends. We see Crime and Fraud the don’t speak out.

You can be a good person and still have poor judgment.

It can happen to anyone. We are human we make mistakes.

Just because we’ve lost our way doesn’t mean we are lost forever. In the end, it’s not the failures that define us so much, it’s how we respond.

We all get steered off off course at some point in our lives. What really counts isn’t that we make mistakes but the choices we make following those mistakes.

For example: A teen who gets in trouble with the law, can accept responsibility for his actions, change their behavior, and go on to lead a nation, or they can see only failure and tumble into a vicious cycle of committing even-larger crimes.

It’s not that you stumble it’s that you get back up. It’s not that you did wrong but realizing what’s happening and change. It’s not that you messed up, it’s that you see ways you can be better. Having the wrong priorities is bad enough, but realizing that and refusing to change is worse. It’s not that you never take the time to smell the roses and admire the sunset; it’s that once you realize this, you take the time to notice.

“Success is never final. Failure is never fatal. It’s courage that counts

John Wooden

Mistakes are bad, but not learning from them is worse. The key to learning from your mistakes is to admit them without excuses or defensiveness, rub your nose in them a little, and make the changes you need to make to grow going forward. If you can’t admit your mistakes, you won’t grow.

Forgetting your mistakes is a terrible error if your trying to improve your cognition. Why not celebrate stupidity. A

If anyone rebut me-show me I’m making a mistake or looking at things from the wrong perspective- I’ll gladly change. It’s the truth I’m after and the truth has never harmed anyone. What harms us is to persist in self-deceit and ignorance.

The Spiritual Man And Woman

For the purpose of this post I will use man know this is for woman also.

The functions of the spirit,the soul, and the body.

The body is the world-consciousness the soul is self-consciousness and the Spirit is the God-consciousness. There are five organs in the body which enables man to communicate with the physical world. This is why it is called world-consciousness. The soul comprises that part in man known as the intellect, which make man’s existence possible. The part of love generates affection toward other human beings or objects. Affections originate from the senses. All this are parts of man himself they form the personality of man we call this self-consciousness. The Spirit is the part which an communicates with a God, serves Him and understands his relationship with God. We call this a God-consciousness. Just as God dwells in the spirit, the self dwells in the soul, and the senses dwell in the body.

The soul is the meeting place here the spirit and the body join. Man communicates with God’s Spirit and the spiritual realm through the spirit and receives and expresses power and life in the spiritual realm through this spirit. He communicates with the outside world of senses through the body. The world and the body interact with one another. The soul lies in between those two worlds and belongs to these two worlds. On one hand it communicates with the spiritual realm through the spirit, one on the other hand it communicates with the physical world through our body.

The soul has the power of determination- it can make decisions concerning the things related to it in the environment and can choose or reject them. It is impossible for the spirit to control the body directly; it requires a medium. (for lack of another word) This medium is our soul, which was produced when the spirit touched the body. The soul is in between the spirit and the body. It binds the spirit and body together as one.

The spirit can rule over the body through the soul and subject it under God’s power. The body can also insure the spirit through the soul to love the world.

Among the three elements of man, the spirit is joined to a God and is the highest. The body is in contact with the material world and this is the lowest. In between the two is the soul. It takes as it’s nature the nature of the other two. As it becomes the linkage of the other two parts. Through the soul the two parts can fellowship with each other and work together. The function of the soul is to maintain the spirit and the body in their proper order so that they will not lose their proper relationship with one another. In this way, the body with is the lowest, will submit to the spirit, and the spirit, which is highest, will be able to control the body through the soul. The soul is definitely the chief element in man. The soul looks to the spirit for the supply with the latter has received from the Holy Spirit and communicates to the body what it has received so that the body may partake of the perfection of the Holy Spirit and becomes a spiritual body.

The Spirit= The Soul= The Body.

The Promise Of Psalm 91

Everyone has a favorite chapter it verse in the Bible.

Words of promise, words of encouragement, others speak of God’s love and mercy to us. But what does that mean?

Life is filled with promises, some are small and some great and Psalm 91 has been and continues to be a source of strength, hope, promise and encouragement.

I would have lost my mind it if wasn’t for the help and strength of Psalm 91.

Psalm 91

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, ‘He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust. ‘Surly he will save you from the Fowler’s snare and from deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his feathers (wings) you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart (earthwork). You will nor fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence (disease) that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday. A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand (Sid3), but it will not come near you. You will only observe with your eyes and see the punishment of the wicked. If you make the Most High your dwelling place even the Lord, who is my refuge- then no harm will befall you, no disaster will com near your tent. For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all of your ways; they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike yours foot against a stone. You will tread upon the lion and the cobra; you will trample the great lion and the serpent. ‘Because he loves me,’ says the Lord, I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. With long life I will satisfy him and show him salvation.

When this verse says nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness… this does not mean we won’t have disease or sickness. It means your soul will not be troubled. Many readers confuse this Psalm to mean no harm will come to them. Unfortunately we live in a world of disease and sickness.

We all need a place to go when we’re stressed or sad, tired or lonely, fearful or tempted, disappointed or discouraged. A place where we can unload our burdens and get some relief.

Psalm 91 is an expression of the child of God’s confidence in Devine protection and deliverance.

When we feel insecure and inadequate we need a refuge, a shelter. We need a retreat.

We need to utilize prayer as a way to get away from it all, but there’s much more. As with many passages and verses in the Bible, you cannot claim the promise unless you meet the requirements. These are conditional and unconditional promises ofGod found in the Bible. Most promises that begin with ‘if’ are conditional.

God promises to do something if we do something. There are some passages that are also limited to people who live a certain way. Romans chapter 8 is one such passage. If you live according to Romans 8:1 “Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” then Romans 8 is yours.

Psalm 91 is another. If you live according to Psalm 91:1 then the psalm is yours. He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.

Notice the requirements of Psalm 91:1. He that dwells- not visits, not professes, not wishes, not rejects, Dwells.

Dwell means “abide” to live or stay as a permanent resident; reside. to linger over, emphasize, or ponder in thought, speech, or writing.

God wants us to have a prayer life not a life of prayer. A life of prayer is just an activity you perform. A prayer life is an identity you embrace as a person of God. If you spend time in God’s Word and pray as your days go on. You have a prayer life. If you pray only when it’s convenient for you, this is a life of prayer.

Did you know many cultures pray 7 times a day. No matter how there day is going or where they are. If you’re in the grocery store pray silently, God will here you.

Do We Prevent Ourselves From Finding Happiness?

Two Things Prevent Us From Living In Happiness. Living In The Past, And Observing Others.

Living in the past: when we spend too much time thinking about what we did do or wishing that we hadn’t done. Or focusing on how things did not go the way we wanted them to. I know for me some certain thoughts or triggers bring up the past. Things I wished I did but didn’t. It’s funny how you go back and think of what you should have said or done and dwell on it for days or hours. Why, when you can’t do anything about it. Like if someone is talking about their mother, or someone asks about mine.

It just keeps us stuck in the past unable to move forward. I have learned to practice mindfulness. It teaches you to be in the present moment and over time you spend less time thinking about the past. Rehashing, I for one am guilty of this. We spend so much of our mental energy on our past. Think about all time you would free up by being mindful and the stress you wouldn’t have.

Observing others: trying to keep up with the Joneses. We try to be like everyone else. What they have they have, and what you have you have. Stop trying to be like everyone else and be yourself. We all want to be successful and happy but, we won’t get it is like someone else. We get it by being ourselves. Don’t spend your time watching everyone else spend you time on being a successful happy you. No faking or imitating others. Just because it worked for them doesn’t mean it going to work for you in the same way.

We can be our own worst enemies when it comes to finding happiness. Overthinking and rehashing thing from our past. Comparing ourselves to others and the judging ourselves for not being at that same level. We are too hard on ourselves. Healthy competition is fine, using some one else as a goal post to strive towards in good. However we need to recognize that what’s right for someone else might not be what’s right for you.

It’s time to stop getting in our own way and preventing ourselves from finding the happiness we all want.