Reacting is often quick and emotionally charged, and it can occur without much conscious thought or reflection. It can be influenced by past experience, conditioned responses, or the activation of the fight or flight response in the face of perceived threats.
In contrast to this, responding typically involved a more deliberate and thoughtful approach. Taking time to process information, consider different perspectives and choose the course of action consciously. When we learn to respond, we are more likely to experience more positive outcomes in our daily interactions.
Reactions are often based in the moment, and driven by emotion, they are often aggressive and fuel disagreement, this triggered psychological responses in the body, such as increased heart rate or sweating. While a response to a well-thought-out reaction can result in a positive outcome.
We can control the urge to react by practicing mindfulness. Mindfulness involves acceptance and nonjudgmental awareness of present-moment experiences that can help us respond rather than react in difficult situations. By pausing and being mindful, we can be present with our thoughts and feelings to identify our triggers so we can choose how to respond rather than react.
I learned a little trick years ago that has worked for me in difficult situations. It is taking 10 deep breaths to calm and relax my body to avoid reacting.
The benefits of being mindful lead to:
- Less emotional reactivity
- Reduce stress and rumination
- Increased cognitive flexibility
- Higher relationship satisfaction
Learning to respond and empower you to become a better person. Here are a few ways I respond rather than react:
Name your emotions
Verbalize them out loud or write them in a journal. This helps your brain realize the situation is temporary.
Recognize how your body feels
Pay attention to any physical symptoms you’re having. This helps you in the future to know when you’re being triggered. For example I can the tension in my neck when I’m feeling triggered.
Use your breath to regain control
Take 10 deep breaths. This helps slow your breath to a calm rhythm.
Ask yourself why you reacted
This helps identify and deal with what triggered you so you can respond, not react.
Practice mindfulness regularly
This helps improve your awareness of your body and brain responses, which helps you respond rather than react. Reacting and responding are both natural human tendencies, developing your ability to respond thoughtfully can lead to more positive outcomes. This helps in conflict resolution and decision-making. With practice and self-awareness, you can cultivate the skills necessary to respond mindfully.
From Pity to Praise 