For many people one of the most frustrating aspects of life is not being to understand other people’s behavior. We see them as guilty instead of innocent. It’s tempting to focus on people’s irrational behavior, comments, actions, selfish behavior, and mean-spirited acts and get extremely frustrated. It is easy to focus on that behavior too much and it may seem like other people are just doing it to make us miserable.
It’s true other people do weird things (who doesn’t), but when you think about it we are the ones getting upset, so we are the ones who need to change. It’s not about accepting, ignoring, or advocating violence or any other deviant behavior. I’m talking about being less bothered by the actions of people
Seeing the innocence is a powerful tool for seeing a complete change that means when someone is acting in a way that we don’t like, the best strategy for dealing with that person is to distance yourself from their behavior.
This strategy works for people judging you, you don’t have to stand there and listen to them just walk away, refuse to listen to them, they don’t know your story, they don’t know what you’ve been through. So look beyond it.
Very often a slight shift in our thinking can put you thinking into a estate of compassion. Ask yourself why are they acting this way, what’s their story?
I have had people pressure me into doing things I don’t feel comfortable in doing. If I had focused on the words they use, the tone of their voices and the urgency of their messages. I would have gotten annoyed, even angry in my responses. I would have seen them as guilty. Underneath even the most annoying behavior is a frustrated person who is crying out for compassion.
Next time you are dealing with a person that acts in a strange way look for the innocence in their behavior. If your compassionate it won’t be hard to see. When you see the person in a better light you won’t be as frustrated by their actions.
Look for the good in people instead of the bad. It will be easier to focus on the beauty of life.