One of the many wonders of your brain how it rationalizes your behavior.
Something happens and you react, and then your brain instantly concocts a reason for your reaction that seems to justify your behavior even if the reason makes no sense. Like, when you get angry because you can’t find on object when doing a task. Have you ever been wrapping gifts and you lose the tape you are using and you blame someone else for taking it or sitting them down somewhere else.You ignore the reasons that your frustrated and your patience is wearing thin. You suppress you frustration in wrapping gifts. Then you find the tape on the table having looked right past them.
The ingenuity of self-deception is inexhaustible.
The act of rationalizing is so quick, the best you can do is to recognize when it occurs and choose to consider what else can be causing your reaction.Hannah Moore- 1881
Accept responsibility for your actions
Accept yourself as powerful instead as a victim to remove the veil of self-deception. When you seek to find what is triggering how you feel in the moment, you give your self the chance to feel differently if you want to. You will also have clarity on what you need to do or what you need to ask for to change your circumstances.
What would your life be like if you were in control of your reactions? Would you feel free if you lived your life by choice?
As I said before I try every Christmas to. Wrap gifts, I use to spend the day wrapping all the gifts. My reaction was to get frustrated and lose my supplies ( tape, scissors, name tags.) I had to recognize I was having an emotional reaction to wrapping to many gifts at once. When I began wrapping a few gifts a everyday. My frustration stopped.
Recognizing that you are having an emotional reaction as soon as it begins to appear in your body. At any moment your rate of breathing, blood flow, the tension in your muscles, or construction in your gut. It represents a pattern you can identify as a feeling. The quicker you recognize that you are breathing fast, or not at all, that certain muscles in your body tighten, or you feel pressure in your gut. Stop and ask yourself what you are feeling and why.
Don’t judge or fear your emotions. No matter what you learned about the evils of emotions. If you don’t recognize your feeling, you cannot change them, and this negatively impacts your relationships, job performance, and your overall happiness.
If the emotion is related to fear, anger, frustration, or sadness, you have triggered an emotion.
What do you think you lost or what did you not get that you expected or desired to have?
The strengths that have help in your life are your greatest emotional triggers when you feel someone is not honoring one of them. When your brain perceived that someone has taken of plans to take one of these important things away from you, your emotions are triggered.
The quicker you notice an emotion is triggered, the quicker you can discover if the threat is real or not.