No matter where your at getting along with people you’re surrounded by can be challenging at best. The inability to get along with others we may not like can have a huge impact on our future. It might be a co-worker or it might be the tension with an in-law (or three) that adds undue stress to your important relationships.
In business it may be that you aren’t getting along with your boss. At best, this can make your day-to-day work unpleasant, but this could also have a negative impact on your career as a whole. Learning to communicate and get along with others is vital to our success.
Even though I don’t get along with my mother-in-law. She has completely different views and value system than me. I have to be around her sometime. sometimes.
Getting along with people you don’t like doesn’t imply defeat, giving in or compromise, it’s a ways getting through life without constantly banging your head against the wall and being miserable in situations where you could, at the very least, be at ease.
There are three ways you can along with people you don’t like. Here they are:
Take a look in the mirror
The first step to getting along with others is knowing that you can’t change anyone but yourself. It doesn’t do any good to try and change anyone. The fact is that you will most likely make things worse. And trying to make someone change their behavior is nothing less than manipulation; and who likes being manipulated?
If there is something that someone does on a regular basis that gets on your last nerve, take a look in the mirror and consider that this behavior might be something that you engage I. And aren’t particularly proud of. We’ve all done things or act in ways that we’re not happy with. When we see others act similarly this might cause for us to lash out or contend with this person. It’s been found that one of the main reasons people lash out is to renew a sense of confidence.
Next time that person does something to tick you off, pause and ask yourself if what they did is really that bad or just something that hits close to home regarding your own patterns.
The Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.Bob Marley
Avoid trigger topics
There’s a good reason that you don’t discuss politics or religion at a dinner party. These are sensitive topics and people tend to have very strong opinions about them. I’ve seen people get into bitter arguments because they sit on opposite sides of the fence politically speaking. (Actually I’ve been in some bitter arguments about this.) suddenly one’s accusing the other of lacking sensitivity because they voted for someone because they voted for someone they didn’t like.
Five minutes earlier they were laughing and joking together and now they’re making comments they can never can take back.
But it’s not just politics or religion that might set someone off. Anything from how to raise kids to what you should be eating and anything in between that can start an argument. Especially when tension already exists in a relationship.
We’ve all been guilty of intentionally pushing someone’s buttons and we know what it’s like for someone to push ours. You know exactly what to say to get someone’s goat. It might even be amusing but, it’s only creating more and more tension in the relationship.
If you want to start getting along with someone you usually can’t stand being around, consider the topics you argue over and avoid them if possible. Start taking note of some common ground you have and focus there instead.
Never above you. Never below you. Always beside you.Walter Winchell
Stay clear of social media
There are certainly benefits to social media, but social media platforms like Facebook and Twitter can be breeding grounds for intense debates. I’ve seen people display their worst side on social media. Maybe it’s because they feel isolated since they aren’t engaging in face to face conversations. It’s easy to share your political views or lash out at someone because of theirs when you’re sitting behind a computer or mobile device. And it just breeds anger in to your life. And Lord knows we don’t need anymore of that.
If you have someone in your life you’re rather not be around, then why are you following them on social media? It’s simple to block content and unfollow someone on any social media platform. Continuing to tweet and comment with or about people you don’t like only adds to stress.
So, if you’re ready to get along better with people you don’t like then follow these three steps. Not on,y will you have a better time being around them, you might even find enough common ground to enjoy their company. You can at least start by tolerating them, but it will never happen without effort on your part.