When it comes to dealing with disappointment, the way you choose to handle it can determine how your life will turn out. When you feel disappointed, all that means is that something or someone will help me up to our expectation. For most people, this occurs when we reach for a goal and come up short. Everyone has to deal with this. The way we handle situations will determine our success or failure in life.
Let’s look into why we feel disappointed and something we can do to overcome this feeling.
Expectations are nothing but rules. These rules will dictate, at least in your mind, what has to happen before a satisfactory result is achieved. Say you wanted to lose 15 pounds in 30 days. You go out there and you start working out and eating right. You do everything the experts tell you and when the 30 days is up, you step on the scale to find out you’ve only lost 10 pounds. Chances are that you will feel quite disappointed. The reason is because you set a rule on that have to happen for you to feel satisfied.
So what do you do in this situation or any other situation where you fail to achieve what you set out to achieve? If you do let more people view and you give up or complain and whine about how you never get what you want, then you were going to continue to feel miserable. If you decide that you’re going to adjust and do better next time, you will be able to succeed at handling disappointing situations in a productive way.
Remember that disappointment it’s just a feeling that is caused by the rules you set up. This works externally as well. Let’s say you expected that your child will get straight A’s in school but they end up getting mostly B’s, The only reason you feel disappointed is because you created the rule that unless your child gets all A’s you will not be satisfied.
So how can we use this back to help you deal with disappointment? There are two things you can do. The first is to realize that when you’re feeling disappointed, it’s because certain rule that you have created were not met. Whether the rules were placed on you or by someone else it doesn’t matter. In order to deal with this feeling, one thing you can do if you change the rules.
Instead of saying, “If I don’t lose 15 pounds in 30 days, I’m going to be disappointed,” you can say, “I will do everything I can to reach my boa but if I happen to fall short, I will at least know that I gave it my all.” This is just an example but hopefully you get the point. You made the rules that card yourself to feel disappointed which means you can also change the rules.
The second thing you can do legs your rule you set up for other people. If you want to stop being disappointed all the time when it comes to other people, create the rules that make it harder for people who make you disappointed. The rules that hair to happen or you could be satisfied or not something you were born with. You created them. It’s great to have high expectations for yourself because you have control over your actions but when you place too many rules on other people who don’t have that self-control, be prepared to have a lot of disappointment.
Dealing with disappointment just requires understanding what causes a feeling you come up in the first place. Once you understand that it’s a result of you or other people willing to meet your rules of what has to happen for you to feel satisfied, you can begin to start changing those rules and make it harder for you to feel disappointment.