What do you usually do when facing adversity? Do you muster up all your strength, willpower, and courage? Or do you quickly succumb to your difficulties and retreat back in your comfort zone?
These are two normal responses to seemingly overwhelming odds. We either muster up the strength and courage to move forward or wilt under the pressure.
However, there is a actually a third response that many people don’t know about. And it possibly transcends the other two options. And that is to release and let go.
Tao Te Ching said,
When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. When I let go of what a I have, I receive what I need.
So, what does it mean to release and let go? It means surrendering to the present moment. It meaning surrendering yourself to your current circumstances.
Surrendering is, or course not giving up. To give up means to quit and take no action in the direction of your desired outcome. It’s a form of retreat where you move away from something you thought you desperately needed or want.
I lived my life so long holding on to baggage that I was never meant to hold on to. I hide a family secret and I stubbornly refused to let go of my life’s traumas. (my baggage). I was never meant to hold on to. I spent 40 years of my life fighting to hold on to who I thought I was. When the whole time I only had to drop my baggage and begin healing. It was only when I thought I couldn’t fight anymore and had an emotional break. I realized I couldn’t live my life one more minute on my own. I needed help. Once I reached the point of surrender did I truly begin to heal.
Surrendering is very much like stepping back rather than a full retreat. It gives you space to think about your life and circumstances. It gives you space to gather new insights and perspectives. It gives you space to find a better way – to allow for a positive change and transformation.
When you surrender you release All attachment to the past memories of failure and mistakes, to the people that are holding you back (whether alive or not). and the unhelpful thoughts and feelings that often sabotages our progress.
When you release and let go, you’re surrendering to the present moment. You’re surrendering yourself to how things are right now, and this makes space for now opportunities and perspectives.
However, this carefree state of mind doesn’t only apply to moments of friction, change, conflict or discomfort that eats away at the happiness in you’re life. It also applies to the moments when you are chasing your goals.
Whenever we fight and struggle to resist, we get riled up emotionally. And when that happens, our emotions often cloud our judgement. They create a pattern of resistance where we struggle to see things clearly and objectively. And as a result, we make poor choices and get attached to specific outcomes.
When you release and let go, you’re not trying to avoid the consequences of you’re predicament. You don’t forget what has happened or the reality of your circumstances, but instead take the time to clear your mind and gain a clearer perspective of the situation.
Releasing and letting go is about taking responsibility. It’s about taking responsibility for whatever situation you find yourself in. It’s about stepping back and allowing yourself to get overwhelmed by a particular emotion of feeling. In other words it’s letting go all the pain and suffering you’ve been hiding from, and allowing the space to begin positive changes and transformation to take place. To start a new life of blessing and promise.
For instance, releasing and letting go of the fear that is getting the better of you. Releasing and letting go when your consistently making unreasonable compromises. And releasing and letting go when you are overly sacrificing your person values.
Release and let go when you struggle with hurts, regrets, failures, and mistakes. Release and let go when you hold grudges or deny yourself the opportunity for growth and development.
Release and let go when you’re feeling lousy and miserable, when your stuck ins rut, and when you feel you’re moving down the wrong path. You don’t have to wait under your a huge burden and weighed down because it will only bring you misery and despair.
People can spend their entire lives resisting all the crap that life throws their way. The more they resist, the deeper they sink into an abyss of endless regrets.
This abyss is kind of like quicksand. Once you get knee deep in the muck, you feel stuck. But your not, it only appears that way. But you don’t realize it so you keep struggling to resist. And as a result to sink deeper into the muck, and before you know it, your in over your head with no way out.
Getting out of the quicksand is about non-resistance. It’s about stepping back and taking your time to think through your dilemma. It’s about releasing and letting go of the baggage you’ve let weigh you down. It’s about releasing and letting go of your struggles. Stop fighting the quicksand, instead use a tool to help you get unstuck.
When you release and let go you free yourself to gain a proper perspective. You free yourself to see things clearly. You can begin to move forward in a better way.
Releasing and letting go won’t be easy but it will be worth it. Especially when it comes to long- term happiness.
Don’t wait until a emotional break down is at your door. To decide to pull yourself out and surrender to your pain and suffering. I tell you it’s much harder to do when your actually in the throes of completely throwing ￼in the towel of life.
To help you release and let go during those crucial moments, take the time to ask yourself the following questions:
- What am I currently holding onto that’s starting to make me feel miserable?
- How exactly does that make me feel?
- What are the long-term consequences of holding on to this?
- Why is it important to let this go?
- What value will I gain by letting this go?
- How can I begin this process?
These questions are a great starting point. But don’t stop there. You need to begin to explore this four phases:
1. Recognize Moments of Attachment. It’s all about awareness. When you begin to get emotionally attached to things. During these moments you may feel uncomfortable or uncertain. That’s when to recognize that it’s time to let go.
2. Write down your thoughts. Take the time yo write down your thoughts. It helps to keep a journal to write in each day. Write down your concerns, problems, and all the things you struggle to let go of. Dig deep and list everything that makes you feel miserable that particular day. One method that works really well is yo tear up or burn that page you wrote on for that day. This ritual can be very powerful symbol that helps you to release and let go. And once it’s done, move on leave the past in the past and choose to move forward with your life. It’s a simple thing, but it can make a huge difference in the way you feel about your life circumstances.
3. Practice Becoming A Witness. When we share our experiences it requires us to mentally step back from your problems and circumstances and viewing them in a third person’s perspective. Kind of like a outsider looking in on the situation.
This witness doesn’t judge or criticize. They just observe on both the outside and the inside. In other words, they observe what’s going on in the outside world and also what’s happening with your thoughts and feelings.
It’s all about being present and mindful. it’s about being mindful of all your decisions, reactions, and the emotions you experience, but without the judgement. It helps you experience everything in a very detached way. Which makes it easier to let go, because your not emotionally engaged. And you think things through more rationally and objectively.
4. Focus on Moving Forward, Not Backward. The final phase is to train yourself to focus on moving forward.
Life is like a yo-yo of experiences. We continuously move back and forth between our past, present and future. We desire to move forward, however, our regrets, mistakes, failures, all the other baggage pulls us back into the past.
Living in the past holds us back in the present and prevents us from moving forward. It keeps us stuck, and holds us hostage. And it riles up nasty emotions that make it difficult to release and let go. When we are unable to release and let go, we cannot move forward, and this eats at our happiness.
One of the best way to separate ourselves from the past is to spend time visualizing.
Take time each day to visualize for 20 minutes, just visualize releasing and letting go of all the stuff that is weighing upon your shoulders.
With every breath, you release visualize expelling these things out into the universe. And with every breath, you inhale, visualize yourself drawing in positive energy that helps you project more joy, compassion, and love into the world.
Your ideal state of mind is to focus on the presents. And one of the best ways to do this is through gratitude.
Take the time to reflect on the things your grateful for.
- What am I grateful for right now?
- Why do I appreciate having these things in my life?
Gratitude will help bring you mind to the present. Then from there, you can focus on moving forward, not backward.
There is a Bible verse I read often. That had helps me to stay focused.
Everything is permissible for me, but not all things are beneficial. Everything is permissible for me, but I will not be enslaved by anything. And brought under it peer, allowing it to control me (1 Corinthians 6:12 Amp).
Do not let you baggage that is weighing you down to enslave you.