Some choices in life are easy to make like picking a movie to watch or which dessert to eat. Others are far more difficult, like choosing to forgive the person who has hurt you, or choosing to harbor resentment, anger, and outrage against a person. What feels like the instinctive thing to do isn’t always the right or best thing to do. It can make us as cold as the tree above not only to the person who hurt us, but to everyone around us.
Forgiveness is ultimately a choice we must make and then find the strength to do. It’s not usually an easy thing to do. The more personal the pain, the more difficult it is to accomplish.
In the Old Testament, Joseph was hated by his brothers because of his favored status by their father. So they conspired against him, threw him to the bottom of a well, and left him there until they sold him into slavery. Then they told their father he had been torn apart by a lion. They proved His death by shredding and dipping it in blood to make their story believable.
Fast forward years later and their quarrel still existed. The brothers’ standing with their father had not improved any because Joseph was out of the picture. If anything, they had to deal with their father’s mourning and sorrow for his loss that had lasted for years. It was a constant reminder of what they had done.
Joseph, on the other hand had become a slave of Potiphar, an Egyptian officer and captain of Pharaoh’s guard. But he knew quality when he saw it, and promoted Joseph to be the keeper of all he had. He trusted Joseph with everything in his life. When Potiphar’s wife tried to be unfaithful to Joseph and he chose to remain clean by running away from her, she complained to her husband, and Joseph ended up in prison. Now he had a prison record and time that added to his reputation.
But Joseph remained faithful to the Lord and served in prison as much as he could. And ended up being a leader and trusted to run King Pharaoh’s entire prison. Eventually, he even interpreted the dreams of a couple of the Kings servants. When King Pharaoh had a dream he couldn’t interpret, he was told of Joseph’s ability to interpret dreams and was brought before Pharaoh himself.
When Joseph correctly gave the meaning of the kings dream, Pharaoh made Joseph the second in command in all of Egypt. Because of Joseph’s devotion to God, and God’s blessings that prospered all that Joseph did, the land of Egypt was ready when the seven years of famine struck. People from all over the area came to Egypt because that was the only place that had any food. Countries paid dearly for the food they bought from Egypt. This prosperity wax told to Jacob, Joseph’s father, and he sent his sons to Egypt to buy grain for his family.
None of them knew what had become of Joseph. In Egypt, he was known by another name, and he was now grown up married with children. Many years had passed since he had been betrayed by his brothers. When the brothers saw and spoke with him, he used an interpreter to speak with them, and they didn’t recognize it was him.
There is a point to this story. Many of us should learn and teach when we get the chance. Joseph had been betrayed, sold into slavery. He had been taken from his father and family in his youth and spent years confined in prison. He had been taken to a strange land among strangers and had to learn a new language. After all his trials and hardships he had risen to become second in command in all of Egypt, the most powerful country in the world. Now his betraying brothers had come begging for food for their families.
This was the moment that would define Joseph. Would he exact His vengeance for the wrongs done to him? Or would he make them pay? Would he lord over them even after all they had done to him, look what he accomplished! What did Joseph do that would define Him as a person?
Joseph tested His brothers to see if they were sorry for their past wrongs. Even in the testing of his brothers, His love for them was such that he had to flee the room to go elsewhere in the house to weep and so that he would at last be with his family again. And there was no malice in his heart when he did it,
Joseph had plenty of reasons to hate his brothers. And years to nurse a grudge against those who betrayed Him and ruined his life. He had plenty of opportunity to become spiteful and petty, but he didn’t. He forgave His brothers and moved on with his life. And because of this the Lord was able to bless and prosper Joseph, and use him to become where he was in life. In Egypt God used Joseph to save many thousands of people, including those of his own family.
Hurt comes in all forms come to all of us. It cannot be avoided. Sometimes the hurt is accidental, sometimes we just think it was on purpose and sometimes it really is on purpose.
It took me over 30 years to learn how to forgive my mother and what I experienced. Yes, if she asked me to help her I would because we are called to honor our parents. It wasn’t always easy, but it was necessary. I still held unforgiveness in my heart which kept my heart bitter. It wasn’t after she passed away that I began to choose forgiveness and ironically that was when I began healing. I will never understand why or how she could treat anyone as she treated me. Or why it took her dying for me to forgive her.
Through the message of Joseph I learned that God turned evil to good through his experiences with his family and others that had wished ill of him. I just I had chose forgiveness, because it can change a whole lot when we listen and obey His Words.
Forgiveness is something we achieve by taking our pain to the Lord and letting Him lift our burden and ease our anguish. It is the Lord who will whisper words of love and strength, and who will take away the hurt caused by others. Forgiveness is not easy. It’s not for the faint of heart, but forgiveness is also the only path to peace within our own souls.
From Pity to Praise 