Eyes Are Windows To The Soul

Our eyes don’t lie: they’re windows to the soul. They show the truth no matter what face you put on, in any situation. The best way to get to know someone is to look them in the eyes observe what they reveal about their emotional state

Our eyes, just like our body language, give us away, and they say more than we ever could with words. As a matter of fact, most of the information we convey is none-verbal, which ranges from simple looks to all of the movements we make.

Windows to the soul is another way of looking at each other

Studies have shown that when we meet someone for the first time, our eyes can convey a wide range of feelings: trust or distrust, security, contentment, fear, etc… We know this is true because it happens every day: it’s as if we were capable of transcending our bodily limits and reaching their soul through their eyes.

“The soul can speak through the eyes, and kiss with a look.” – Gustavo Adolo Be’cquer

Some experts, whose jobs require them to study faces, have observed that eyes are the window to the soul because they’re the most sincere part of the face. We don’t have any control over our eyes, as opposed to the mouth, for example: When you look at something, your pupils dilate involuntarily and give you away, and they contract as a sign of rejection.

The none-verbal language of our eyes.

Here’s a list of some of the information that eyes can convey:

Sadness. Through the windows of the soul, we can see sadness, one of the emotions we feel the most but often try to hide. In this case, the eyelids rise, as does the lower edge of the eyebrows.

Anger. When we get angry, our eyebrows arch and our expression is completely serious.

Uncertainty or Evaluation. When we listen to someone and narrow our eyes, we’re indicating that we’re either evaluating what they’re saying and doubting its validity, not we don’t understand what they’re saying. Half-closed eyes can also indicate tiredness.

Sexual desire or concentration. When we feel sexual desire or concentrate, the pupils dialate as I’ve mentioned before, which leaves us completely exposed to the other person. We cannot avoid it, so we usually rub our eyes because they get wet and we feel comfortable.

“They terrify me, weaken me, it kills me to know that your beauty is not in your eyes, but in the way, you look at me.” -David Sant

Social Faces. As I’ve talked about, the expression “the eyes are windows to the soul” is based on truth. However, it goes much further than that. A study was done by psychologists and other scientists from different branches of the study of human language, throughout our lives, up until we’re about 40 years old, were chosen from a series of faces that we adapt to different, distinct communicative situations.

This is called social face.

Example. In sad moments when we feel, the urge to laugh, our expression keeps its composure. On this subject, Teresa Bar’o said that this doesn’t mean we’re liars, since we live in a society that demands certain patterns of behavior that we must maintain as a manner of survival.

We are not liars because we can’t be. We can voluntarily make our facial expressions and movements more appropriate, but we can’t stop our eyes from reflecting how we feel.

“The worst way you can betray yourself is to not do the things that make your eyes shine.” -Anonymous

Steps To Set And Achieve Bold Goals

I just applied a Goal Sheet, that I use when I need to set a goal. It is a guide line for when you want to set goals.

I am meeting with a group of friends every week using a weekly goal sheet to help us further our success in life.

I am working on Being Bold in public. I find it difficult to be bold and speak up when in a conversation with others. It is a goal that will take longer than a week, but that’s okay. It’s something I’ve needed to accomplish for a while now.

You’ve heard the saying, and it’s well known for a reason: If your goals aren’t big enough that they inspire the socks off you (even if they simultaneously leave your knees shaking), then you’re going to be hard pressed to stay the course over the long term to make the. A reality.

There’s a catch: You need to write them down.

While it’s now accepted wisdom that having a plan that sets you up for success, versus having no plan, sticking rigidity to a pre-set course of action can actually work against you in the long run.

The Key Is Flexibility

Put another way, if your plan A to get from where you are now to where you want to go isn’t working for you, then be willing to change course and go with plan B, or C or D.

Having a plan to achieve a goal can improve your change for success, but if followed rigidly, it can make you close-Minded and unable to identify better and more viable options as conditions change.

I have set up times during my day, the work on my goal, such as praying and asking God for help. Reading articles of goal setting. Even if it 20 minutes a day. It will help you achieve your goals.

Qualities Everyone Needs To Reach Their Biggest Goals

1. Set Bold Goals. Vision equals power. So as you look out to the year ahead, dare to set some brave, clear and compelling goals that excite and inspire you. Doing so helps you focus your time and energy more effectively and will set you up to accomplish more than you otherwise would.

For example, do you want to change jobs. Do want to watch your mouth. Write it down in ways that specify a clear what and when that enable you to track and measure success.

2. Make A Plan. Create a game plan to achieve your goals. That is, what specific actions and strategies will you use to get from point A to your desired point B? If you want to change jobs you may want to take a few classes to learn a different skill, so you’ll be more capable for the other job. If you have to set your alarm earlier to work on your goal.

3. Review Your Plan. Every few weeks you can dedicate time to compare your progress to your plan and objectively assess how effectively your plan is working for you. If it’s not, look at the underlying reasons why. Are they temporary or permanent? Are they within your control or outside it? Be honest, even if the reality isn’t what you were hoping for.

4. Embrace Failing Forward. No one likes to fail. But unless we gives ourselves permission to fail fast and often we cannot possibly succeed. Often, people can get stuck because they were so attached to their plan A they don’t want to admit it’s not working or needs refining. So ask yourself here, what it might cost me if I maintain my current approach? Again be honest, even if it’s painful.

Sunk cost bias can drive otherwise intelligent people into a cycle of self-defeating (and unintelligent) decision-making. Don’t kid yourself into thinking that doing more of what’s not working suddenly will start working. Smart people fail all the time. They just don’t take years to do it. Learn to fail fast and quit quickly.

5. Tweak Continually. To get where you want to go you need to keep tweaking (experiencing) and adjusting your course until you arrive at your desired destination. This also includes adjusting where you’ve set your sights depending on what you learn as you move

Sometimes as we move toward goals, we gain greater clarity about what we truly want and what we don’t want. This is part of our journey as “human beings” discovering who we are and who we’re called to become in this world. For instance, when I decided to make a career change in Nursing in my late 30’s, I went to college to study Psychology and Criminal Justice. And I learned what my true calling as it was to be a bridge for others who were suffering through life.

Sometimes As We Move Towards Goals, We Gain Greater Clarity About What We Truly Want And What We Don’t Want.

Feel The Feeling But Don’t Become The Emotion

Just like our thoughts, our feelings and emotions are powerful. What we think and how we feel are related.

We must never underestimate the power of our emotions. Our thoughts and emotions are entangled and linked in ways we sometimes can’t comprehend. A common flaw in everyone is the lack of awareness of our thoughts. Most times we tend to react rather the reflect or respond.

The technique to transform is by being aware of what we are thinking, feeling, and witnessing them without judgments. From this space of awareness we can choose to release what’s not needed and connect with the power of choice we have.

Reflect

Close your eyes, take a deep breath and invite a feeling of calmness. With every breath in- be aware of air going in and out with every Breath out- Release, let go of any tensions, worries… Continue to breathe and keep the focus on breath, sensations, and feelings.

Respond

If you feel any tension, stress or negative thoughts come back to your breath.

Pick 1 or more Affirmations (Positive statements).

Affirm by repeating them:

“I am Relaxed”

“I am Calm”

“I breathe and leg go”

Intregate

Remember this practice and affirmations. At any time if you feel stress, emotional, angry, anxious, take a pause to reflect and respond by breathing and letting go.

Remind yourself that “you are the captain of your sailboat” the master of your life.

I always combine this quote with an Affirmation “ I allow myself to feel and release” and forgiveness.

Loving Kindness Meditation

In loving mother ndness meditation, one is guided through I imaginary, words to phrases to extend positive thoughts to others and the self. Loving-kindness meditation cultivates feelings of compassion, equanimity, and gratitude. Loving-kindness is a mindfulness meditation that helps with mental calmness, composite, and evenness of temper, especially in difficult situations.

“Feel The Feeling But Don’t Become The Emotion. Witness it. Allow it. Release it!” -Crystal Andrus

Reasons You Should Never Depend On Anyone Else To Find Happiness

Although we need other people in our lives to avoid indefinite isolation we also need to be able to support ourselves when the going gets tough. That being said we should not depend on anyone else to support the need we can support ourselves. Here are some reasons why being independent is the best way to live your life.

You Are The Key To Your Own Success

Truth be told no one is going to walk you through life and hold your hand every step of the way. We luckily have tools built into us, tools like drive, desire, passion, motivation, and got that allow us to leave our mark and reach our goals. These are the tools, no one can take away from us, and although support from the outside can help, how far you will go is ultimately up to you. We all have what it takes, but it’s up to you if you to put in the effort.

Relying Completely On Others Will Only Result In Being Let Down

Although friends and family are key to any healthy lifestyle the truth is we all lead busy lives. Friends, family, and co-workers will listen to your problems, but they won’t solve them, and depending on them for that purpose will only lead to disappointment. With that being said, it’s important to learn to be able to power through on your own sometimes and not always depend on others to help you out of a tough spot. However, know it’s never wrong to ask for help when you need to.

A Helping Hand Will Only Carry You So Far

We all need a helping hand once in a while, but relying on it all the time can be detrimental to your success. You can power through even the toughest of storms, and if you rely on the help of others all the time you’ll never discover your full potential. Remember you can go the distance.

You Know Yourself Better Than Anyone

No matter how close you are to your friends and family only you know what makes you tick. You are beautiful, You are unique, you are one of a kind and you know everything there is to know about you. That being said you know you can always depend on yourself when all else is lost.

You Can Find Happiness Within Yourself

Happiness is not a tangible object you can see, it’s more than a state of mind. Although a large part of our happiness is derived through our connections to our families and friends, we need to learn how to find happiness within ourselves. Once we learn to do thishappiness, takes on a whole new meaning and we discover we appreciate it more than ever.

You Have More Potential Than Anyone You Know

When it comes to achieving your goals, there is only one person who stands in your way. Yourself. Once you become to this realization you know that once you defeat your lack of motivation or whatever stands in your way, all other obstacles are obsolete in your journey of accomplishment.

You Have The Power To Make Change Happen

No matter where you derive your motivation know only you have the power to make your goals a reality. You hold all the power in your life and you decide what makes you happy. Relying on others for something so essential to life will make your life a waiting game and life is too short for that. Instead, make your life a game of action and adventure and derive your happiness from the changes you have the power to make.

Why Assuming Might Be Your Most Dangerous Daily Habit

Assumptions Kill.

This is not an exaggeration, it a fact.

As insignificant and meaningless some assumptions may be, others can change the course of your life. And I’ve witnessed it first hand.

My father would always say, “when you assume you make an “ass out of u and me.” Those words have stuck with me all these years.

We need to make sure assumptions don’t lead to mistakes in our lives.

Assumptions Are Dangerous In Many Spectrums:

From word, business, and for our personal life. How exactly? I’ll give you the short version. But first, understand that even as I am writing this, I’m not perfect with managing assumptions either.

Just like you, I’m make assumptions. Most of them, probably subconsciously. I’m not sure it’s even realistic to try to erase all the smallest assumptions we tend to make daily, the ones that have little to no impact on out lives.

But awareness is the first step to avoiding assumptions that could cost us big time.

Because of my father never assume is one of my top core values.

Once we’re aware and consciously seeking to get ride of assumptions in our daily lives, we get to keep control of situations, we avoid communication problems, and ultimately, we drastically reduce the mistake made by ourselves, and others.

Essentially in our world today, we assume someone is a certain color and we assume they are bad. The fact is no matter what color you skin is, there is good and bad in everyone. Just because they have a different belief system does mean there terrible people.

Assumptions allow you to hide behind your version of the story. This men’s you don’t own your part in the true story. We sometimes prefer to blame others for our misfortune, rather than look in the mirror. They keep you stuck in the past.

It’s easy to make assumptions. All you need is incomplete information about a situation. And an unwillingness to ask the questions you need to complete information. In the absence of complete information, you have to fill in the blanks yourself.

You’ll fill in the blanks with your interpretation comes from past experiences that seem similar. It comes from your past experiences and also from those you’ve heard about from others.

Armed with your information. You tend to connect the dots that aren’t there. Your brain can’t help doing this because you’re missing information. Trying to make sense of the situation, you make connections between today and the past. Connections that don’t really exist. You jump to the wrong conclusions.

Have you ever heard someone say “All men are bad?”They were assuming from their past relationships. The truth is not All men are not bad. There are not bad.

How Assumptions Develop

If assumptions are incorrect when dealing with rational matters, ponder this. What happens when your emotions come into play?

All hell breaks loose. You s to emotions arrive with many sensitive buttons. These buttons are the places where you got hurt in the past. Your memory has stored this past pain. And activates it whenever your nervous system recognizes anything that feels painfully familiar.

Once activated, you react as if you’re experiencing that same pain again. Your old pain feels as real today as it did when you got hurt. Your present situation doesn’t even need to be the same as the past one that hurt you.

What Assumptions Do

Behind the harsh words that come to the surface lies the orginal hurt. And the unwillingness to step up and own part of it.

This is toxic for the people you’re lashing out at, and for you. The negative energy expressed with this can take a toll on health. Theirs and yours. And by pressing your pain buttons again and again, you deeper your hurt.

Why You Should Avoid Making Assumptions Like The Plague

1. They’re an easy out. The path of least resistance is also the path of least growth.

2. They stop you from taking responsibility for your life. Assumptions allow you to hide behind your version of the story.

3. They keep you stuck in the past. Assumptions rely on old information to fill in the blanks and connect the dots. Instead of expanding your horizons, you retreat into the past, a painful past.

4. It’s lazy behavior. Instead of asking questions to get the information you need, you jump to conclusions.

5. They foster a negative mindset. Most assumptions are derived from old information. This reinforces your innate negativity bias that dates back to prehistoric times. And it keeps you thinking the world is a hostile place.

6. Assumptions are always wrong. I have a perfect record of the assumptions I’ve made. 100% of them have been wrong. And it’s hard to believe that I’m unique in this.

Life Beyond Assumptions

These days, instead of making assumptions, I ask questions. Lots of them. Even if this means finding out a truth that might be painful to hear. If my default behavior kicks in and I start to assume something, I notice it. And nip in the bud.

Since I started asking questions and stopped making assumptions, I’m much happier. I’ve managed to release much of my past pain by not activating it constantly. I’ve grown a lot from the information I’ve gathered through asking questions. I enjoy conversations more because I’m not worried about protecting myself. I’ve deepened my compassion for others by understanding the fears that lay behind their assumptions. I’m more positive. And I’m more fun to be around.