Finding Your True Self

To thine own self be true in other words don’t try to be someone else. Be yourself. But, who am I and how do I discover my true self? Is my true self who I think I am? Or is it what others say? Which of the many voices that seek to define me are accurate?

In the book of Jeremiah he Wrote God’s words. The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? I the Lord searches the heart and examine the mind to reward a man according to his conduct, according to what his deeds deserve. Here God highlights what we need help in defining ourself because we are given to inaccuracies. He offers Himself as the One who accurately reads our hearts.

We are a Made for Connection with God.

We are born with a body, soul and spirit, and our spirit longs for connection with God.

We are all raised in a particular context, that of our family of origin or household, each of us has a back story that continues to influence us today.

The journey toward awakening begins with God and His initiative to reveal, Himself to us. What is true about God can begin to beauty and wonder in the physical world. The knowledge of God’s majesty, power and existence is innate to us.

We have a inborn morality that points to God. He stirs or awakens a spiritual thirst or hunger to know him.

In the physical world many tend to search for something (anything) that will fill us. We can go on and on trying to fill that hole we feel inside. I searched for years for something that would feel the void I felt inside. Until I found God or He found me. I am completely full now. I search no more.

Dissatisfaction and desperation find us living life on our own terms. When we come acknowledge our need for God. Our desperation for peace and friendship with Him provides life, forgiveness and meaning in Jesus. Once we connect with God, then His description, interpretations and understandings become definitive for us. I know myself truly as I know God and live with Him.

Christian Counseling can be a valuable asset to self-discovery. A Christian counselor can help to pose key questions, reframe conclusions and offer different ideas. They can provide a setting in which you experience a different way of relating and work through your process with support.

I have had the opportunity to see a Christian counselor and it changed my entire perspective on life. It was a great blessing.

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See The Innocence

For many people one of the most frustrating aspects of life is not being to understand other people’s behavior. We see them as guilty instead of innocent. It’s tempting to focus on people’s irrational behavior, comments, actions, selfish behavior, and mean-spirited acts and get extremely frustrated. It is easy to focus on that behavior too much and it may seem like other people are just doing it to make us miserable.

It’s true other people do weird things (who doesn’t), but when you think about it we are the ones getting upset, so we are the ones who need to change. It’s not about accepting, ignoring, or advocating violence or any other deviant behavior. I’m talking about being less bothered by the actions of people

Seeing the innocence is a powerful tool for seeing a complete change that means when someone is acting in a way that we don’t like, the best strategy for dealing with that person is to distance yourself from their behavior.

This strategy works for people judging you, you don’t have to stand there and listen to them just walk away, refuse to listen to them, they don’t know your story, they don’t know what you’ve been through. So look beyond it.

Very often a slight shift in our thinking can put you thinking into a estate of compassion. Ask yourself why are they acting this way, what’s their story?

I have had people pressure me into doing things I don’t feel comfortable in doing. If I had focused on the words they use, the tone of their voices and the urgency of their messages. I would have gotten annoyed, even angry in my responses. I would have seen them as guilty. Underneath even the most annoying behavior is a frustrated person who is crying out for compassion.

Next time you are dealing with a person that acts in a strange way look for the innocence in their behavior. If your compassionate it won’t be hard to see. When you see the person in a better light you won’t be as frustrated by their actions.

Look for the good in people instead of the bad. It will be easier to focus on the beauty of life.

Living A Simple Life

It’s easy for us to spread joy and happiness when our lives has less clutter, less important things and a lot less complications. Even in a world full of distractions and many things to catch our attention, it’s possible to live a focused, simple life.

If you want to live a simple life. Here are some tips.

Focus on God’s purposes

Having a life without purpose is like driving a car without a steering wheel it’s going nowhere. Having the wrong purposes in life, is like driving a car with a steering wheel, but no sense of direction it’s bound to go to the wrong places.

The right purpose for living can only be found in God, who has given life to everything that is living. Since He’s the one who gave us life, He knows the best purpose for it. Which is to our benefit.

Jesus said in Matthew 22: 37-40 to love the Lord with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. The second is you shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments hang the Law.

Be Content With You Lot

In order for us to live a life focused on God’s purpose, it will help to be content with our lot of life, and be content with what God gives us. God gives us what we need for what he wants us to do.

In Philippians 4: 11-13 Paul says: I know what it is like to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through Him who gives me strength.

Paul also encourages us to make it our goal to live quiet lives, minding our own business, working with our own hands, and not meddling in others’ affairs.

In today’s world Americans have become spoiled. In other countries people make $710 dollars a month. Could any American live off that a month? God takes very good care of us. We are blessed everyday. Most people ignore this fact.

See Yourself As God Sees You

How do you see yourself right now?

Spend a few minutes and think about it. What thoughts do you have about yourself today.

Many people find themselves basing our self-worth on how others see us and our accomplishments, feel shame from our past, defining value based on looks, or setting unrealistic standards for ourselves.

I lived this way from when I was a child to just a few years ago. I had no self-worth. If people brought me down I thought I deserved it. Because I was a horrible person and no one wanted to be around me.

But then I realized it didn’t have to be this way. Other’s opinions of me didn’t matter I knew who I was on the inside.

If we only could see ourselves as God sees us!

I want to bring some thought patterns that act as roadblocks to thinking-and living the way God desires.

In 1- Peter 1: 15 tells us about how we can prepare our minds for action. Adjusting our thinking to scripture is the foundation of being holy in all we do.

I must be loved or approved by every other person in my life. Wrong. If we are living to make sure the others love us, we give them permission to evaluate us based on when we do-we give people the power to determine our self-worth.

When we leave home, many of us have internalized parents who are now voices in our heads that tell us what to do. Have you ever been in. Situation where you hear your parents saying, You shouldn’t do that, or I told you what would happen.

But what if your parents have told you that you will never amount to anything or don’t even try. It can go either way.

Many are so concerned about being loved that we give the opposite sex or a person we think highly of the right to evaluate our self-worth. Or, we might sacrifice our own identity to get attention and acceptance even to the extent of pretending we are someone else because we think the opposite sex won’t be impressed with the real you.

Some might deny themselves food to lose weight to try to fit in with the body images portrayed in magazines.

We may even feel pressure from our church community to measure ourselves to certain stereotypes. If we live to please our church community, we may find ourselves negating the interests or gifts that God has given to us.

Our identity is found in Jesus Christ. It is rooted in his freedom-giving mercy. Our identity is that of a child of God and a joint heir with Jesus Christ. Our spiritual inheritance is one of forgiveness, a intimate relationship with Jesus, and hope of spending all eternity enjoying fellowship with God.

These truths assure us of God’s unconditional love, and of the intimacy, security, and hope we find in him. None of this is based on what we do. It is grounded in what God has already accomplished through Christ.

In 1 Peter 1 3-4 says Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Christ Jesus. In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection that can never perish, spoil or fade- kept in heaven for you.

My past history is an important determiner of my present behavior because something once strongly affected my life, it should definitely continue to do so.

Do you feel controlled by a secret? You may have something happen to you that you have revealed to no-one, or you feel shame about certain aspects of the family you grew up in, or maybe you have sinful habits your embarrassed about, such as gossip, lust, pornography, or a critical spirit. Maybe you’re ashamed of something that has been to you.

If you don’t deal, with issues in your past, they will continue to control you. But they don’t have to. You can deal with your pass sin, family histories, as well as past violations to you body and minds.

Conviction always separates from our identity from our own behavior. Shane links these two. Wrong behavior taints our image of ourselves. Good conviction alerts us to the fact that we have done something that goes about internalized values.

Bible conviction is a God given emotion that “red flags” a behavior and tells us it is a rebellion against God. It gives us an “unctions” to confess our sin and experience the love and forgiveness that God has provided for us from Jesus.

1 John: 1-9 tells us if we confess our sins, God is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Any feelings of guilt that come after we’ve confessed our sin are not from God, but may be from our or from satan. We all have to live with the consequences of our sin, but God does not punish us for sin. God disciplines us to get us back on the track so we can continue to experience God’s love and plan for our lives.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you

Jeremiah 29: 11

God word says in John 16:33. Here on earth you will have many trials and tribulations, but take heart; I have overcome the world.

These trials and tribulations are to help us grow, to refine us and make us stronger. God tests us and refines us like silver.

You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Your workmanship is marvelous. This is how God sees us.

You Are Not What You Think You Are

Your mind is powerful: controlling almost everything. It impacts, your health, from sickness to wellness, your mood and the ways your life is going making you a success or a failure.

Try forming a picture in your mind of what you would like to be like then keep a hold of that picture. Every day work on yourself to be a better still having that picture of who you want to be.

Perhaps the most important mental and spiritual principle ever discovered is that what you is going on outside of you reflects what is going on inside of you.

People can sense how to feel on the inside is who you are on the outside.

Jesus wrote what comes out of mouth proceeds from the heart. Matthew 15.

You can tell the inner condition of a person by lookin at the outer conditions in his or her life.

Your mind is powerful. Your though control and determine almost everything that happens to you. It can raise or lower your heart rate, improve or interfere with your digestion, change the chemical composition of your blood, help you to sleep or keep you awake at night.

Your thoughts can make you happy or sad, sometimes in an instant. They can make you alert and aware, or distracted and depressed. They can make you popular or unpopular, confident or insecure, positive or negative. Your thoughts can make you feel powerful or powerless, a victim or a victor, a hero or a coward.

When we are children we have no self-concept. Every idea, opinion, feeling, attitude, or value you have asan adult you learned from childhood. Everything you are today is the result of an idea or impression you took in and accepted as true. When you believe something is true for you, it becomes true for you.

Whatever it may be. You are not what you think you are.

The way I grew up. I was told some pretty messed up things that I accepted as true. It is possible to change with hard work and determination.

Change your thoughts-change your life.

Fear Of The Lord.

I use to think fear of the Lord meant to be afraid of the Lord because if I did anything he would punish me.

But, if fear is a bad thing, then what do you do with the 300 plus scriptures that speak of fearing the Lord in a positive way?

For instance in Isaiah 11: 1-2 says,

And there shall come forth a rod out of the stem of Jesse, and a Branch shall grow out of his roots: And the spirit of the Lord shall rest upon him, the spirit of wisdom and understanding, the spirit of counsel and might, the spirit of knowledge and the fear of the Lord.

This is Jesus fearing his Father. He certainly didn’t dread His Father, nor was he terrified of his judgement. But He honored, revered, trusted, loved and summited to His Father.

In Acts 9: 31 That this positive fear of the Lord that I want to talk about.

If was important for Jesus and the early believers to fear God, then it would be a good idea for us to learn what the fear of the a Lord really is.

I want to give you a few examples.

In America today, we see a total disregard for authority. But the fear of the Lord includes respecting authority- from police officers and government officials to pastors and ministers. If people don’t like those in authority they are being taught to storm the castle and overthrow those in power by any means. But that is not what the Word of God teaches, and it is contrary to the fear of the Lord.

Romans 13: 1-2 says

Let every soul be subject to the higher powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained by God. Whosoever therefore resists the powers, resists the ordinance of a God: and that that resist shall receive themselves damnation.

That’s a powerful message, and it makes it very clear that God ordained governments and expects us to be subject to them. Government, even bad government, is superior to anarchy.

Does this mean that communism or a dictatorship is good form of government? No, but they still have a God-given power to govern, even if their government is not based on the principles of the Word of God.

The same is true in the church

And he gave some, apostles; and some, prophets: and some evangelists: and some pastors as teachers: For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying elf the body of Christ.

James 3: 16 says

For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work.

This is not the fear of the Lord, and it opens the door to sickness, disease, poverty, divorce, poverty, and more.

This doesn’t mean that all pastors or ministers function exactly the way God wants them to. And it doesn’t means you have to drink the Kool-Aid so to speak, just because they are in leadership.

All leaders make mistakes, and there is always room for improvement. But there are still in a place of authority, and honoring them is honoring God.

Sandpaper People.

Let’s face it there are some dear souls that just rub us the wrong way. Sandpaper people.

So what do you do when someone rubs us in the wrong way? Run? Explode? Ignore?

I know many people that run, they don’t even want to be around them. And I have to admit I have ran from sandpaper people.

But you can’t always eliminate conflict in your life by running. You can shrink it down to size and not let it ruin your day or your relationship by the way you deal with it.

Mathew 7:3-5 says why do you see the speck in someone else’s eye but do not notice the log in your own eye? Let me take the speck out of your eye when there is a log your own eye. You Hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of someone else’s eye.

Why is it so easy to see someone else’s fault while totally overlook our own. Are focused on the sandpaper person-what they did, what they said, and how they were wrong. We nitpick every little thing that is wrong with them.

We find the more that is wrong with them the more is right about us. Chances are when we look into our own hearts, we will find our own mountain sized bitterness, pride, resentment. Jesus tells us before we go deal with someone else’s molehill, go get real with yourself and God. Get real then go get right about your own stuff.

The result isn’t just that you are then qualified to deal with someone else’s wrongs. The bigger result is that you are humble and compassionate toward the one who wronged you. Face it we are all wrong on some level most of the time.

Clothe Yourself In Love

Colossians 3: 12-15 tells us to put on therefore, as God’s chosen one’s holy and beloved, a heart of compassion, kindness, loneliness, humility, and perseverance baring with one another, and forgiving one another. If any man has a complaint against any; even as Messiah forgave you, so you do also. Above all these things, walk in love, which is the bond of perfection.

Don’t you want others to be patient with you when you blow it? I sure do.

When we chose to bear with one another it doesn’t mean ignore sin and avoid conflict, it just means we infuse it with some patience. Don’t stomp yourself into a confrontation with an agenda of the ways that person needs to change or apologize. (even if the should) We don’t clothe ourselves in anger when we approach a sandpaper people, we clothe ourselves in the love of Christ. Even if you don’t feel an ounce of love for them because you’re so hurt or mad, Jesus loves them and you can ask a Him to love them through you.

Listen Well

James 1:19-20 Know this my beloved brothers (and sisters): let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger, for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.

I was listening to a speaker by the name of Graham Cooke a few years ago he said if you get into conflict with the intention to hear a person that rubs you the wrong way lays the foundation for a healthy discussion. Tell them what is good about them- they are organized, they have beautiful eyes, they are strong willed. I love to give people hugs, yes even the sandpaper people. When I give the hugs, I can feel who they are, and they give of vibes to who they really are. Let them know you understand-as much as you can- how they make you feel, and then listen to their heart.

Resist Fear

2 Timothy 1: 7 tells us God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.

Now if you’ve removed that plank from your eye, put on love, chosen to approach your sandpaper person as a listener, then it’s time to flat out tell the truth.

Confrontation is hard for me, I avoid it at all costs, but sometimes it’s unavoidable. I don’t ever want to hurt anyone. Even if they have hurt me, when it comes down to it, I don’t want to confront them and correct them. I want to run from them and hide in my own hurt. But, God has not given us a spirit of timidity. Instead he gives us love, power and self-control. That means we can speak the truth in a loving, kind way. We can trust that God will empower us to represent the truth in a situation and represent Him well also.

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Stop Blaming Others

When something doesn’t meet our expectations, many of us operate with the assumption. When in doubt, it must be someone else’s fault. You can see this assumption in action almost everywhere you look-something is missing, so someone else must have moved it; the car isn’t working right, so the mechanic must have repaired it incorrectly; your expenses indeed your income, so your spouse must be spending to much money; the house is a mess so you must be the only one doing your part; a project is late, so your colleagues at work must have not done their share-and on and on it goes.

This type of blaming thinking has become extremely common with our culture. On a personal level, it has led to believe that we are never completely responsible for our own actions, problems, or happiness. When we are in the habit of blaming others, we will blame others for our anger, frustration, depression, stress, and unhappiness. Circumstances don’t make a person, they reveal him or her.

As an experiment, notice what happens when you stop blaming others for anything and everything in your life. This doesn’t mean you don’t hold people accountable for your own happiness and for your reactions to other people and the circumstances around you. When the house is a mess, rather than assuming you’re the only person doing you’re part, clean it up! When your over budget, figure out where you can spend less money. Most important, when your unhappy, remind yourself that only you can make yourself happy.

Blaming others take an enormous amount of mental energy. It’s a drag me down mind -set that creates stress and disease. Blaming makes you feel powerless over your own life because your happiness is contingent on the actions and behavior of others, which you can not control. When you stop blaming others, you will regain your sense of personal power. You will set yourself as a choice maker. You will know that when you are upset, you are playing a key role in the creation of your own feelings. This means that you can play a key role in creating new, more positive feelings. Life is a great deal more fun and easier to manage when you stop blaming others.

Listen To Your Feelings. They Are Trying To Tell You Something

You have at your disposal a foolproof guidance system to navigate you through life. This system, which consists solely of you own feelings, let’s you know whether your off track and headed toward unhappiness and conflict-or on track, headed toward peace of mind. Your feel act like a barometer letting you know what your internal weather is like.

When your not caught up in your thinking, taking things too seriously, your feelings will generally be positive they will affirming that you are using your thinking to your advantage. No mental adjustments need to be made.

When your experience of life is other than pleasant-when you’re feeling angry, resentful, depressed, stressed out, frustrated and so forth, your warning system of feelings kicks in like a red flag to remind you that you are off track, that it’s time to ease up with your thinking, you’ve lost prospective. Mental adjustment does not need to be made. You can think negative feelings in the same way you think of the warning lights on the dashboard of your car. When flashing, they let you know that it’s time to ease up.

Contrary to popular belief, negative feelings don’t need to be studied or analyzed. When you analyze your negative feelings, you’ll usually end up with more of them to contend with.

The next time your feeling bad, rather than getting stuck in analyze paralysis. wondering why you feel the way you do see if instead you can use your feelings to guide you back in the direction toward serenity. Don’t pretend that the negative feelings don’t exist, but try to recognize that the reason your feeling sad, angry, stressed, or whatever it is that you are taking life to seriously- you are sweating the small stuff. Instead of rolling up your sleeves and fighting life back off, take a few deep breaths, and relax. Remember, life isn’t an emergency unless you make it so.

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