Resilience

What Is resilience? It is what gives people the physiological strength to cope with stress and hardship. It is the mental reservoir of strength that people are able to call in in times of need to carry them through without falling apart. Psychologicogists believe that resilient individuals are better able to handle adversity and rebuild their lives after a struggle.

Dealing with change or loss is an inevitable part of life. At some point everyone experiences varying degrees of setbacks. Some of these challenges might be relatively minor with others are disastrous on a much larger scale,

How we deal with these problems can play a significant role in not only the outcome but also the long-term psychological consequences. The good news is that there are things we can do to become more resilient.

People who remain calm in the face of disaster have what is called resilience. Resilient people are able to utilize their skills and strengths to cope and recover from problems and challenges.

These problems may include:

  • Job loss
  • Financial problems
  • Illness
  • Natural disasters
  • Medical emergencies
  • Divorce
  • Death of loved ones

Instead of falling into despair or hiding from problems with unhealthy coping strategies, resilient people face life’s difficulties head on.

This does not mean that they experience less distress, grief, or anxiety than other people do. It means that they use healthy coping skills to handle such difficulties in ways that foster strength and growth. In many cases, they may emerge even stronger than they were before.

Have you ever heard the saying “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger?” Resilient people more than likely believe this is true.

Those who lack this resistance may instead become overwhelmed by such experiences. They may dwell on problems and use unhelpful coping mechanisms to deal with life’s challenges.

Disappointment or failure might drive them to unhealthy, destructive, or even dangerous behaviors. These individuals are slower to recover from setbacks and may experience more psychological distress as a result.

What Resilience Provides

Resilience does not eliminate stress or erase life’s difficulties. People who possess this quality don’t see life through rose-colored lenses; they understand that setbacks happen and that sometimes life is hard and painful. They still experience the negative emotions that come after a tragedy, but their mental outlook allows them to work through these feeling and recover.

Believe me when I tell you for the first 37 years of my life I was far from being resilient. I had to teach myself.

Resilience gives people the strength to tackle problems head-on and overcome adversity, and move on with their lives.

In the wake of the Hurricanes, and the 9/11 attack many people demonstrated the behaviors that show resilience and they experienced few symptoms of depression as a result.

Even in the face of events that seem utterly unimaginable, resilience allows people to marshal the strength to not just survive but to prosper

Who Is Resilient, And Why?

Some people come by these abilities naturally with personality traits that help them remain unflappable in the face of a challenge. However, these behaviors are not just inborn traits found in a select few. Resilience is a result of the complex series of internal and external characteristics, including genetics, physical fitness, mental health, and environment.

Social support is another critical variable that contributed to resilience. Mentally strong people tend to have the support of family and friends who help lift them up in times of trouble.

To become resilient you have to change your perspective on life. Be able to face your fears and push through life’s most difficult times.

Here are a few characteristics that resilient people show:

  • They hold positive views of themselves and their abilities
  • They possess the capacity to make realistic plans and stick to them.
  • They have an internal focus on control.
  • They are good communicators
  • They view themselves as fighters rather than victims
  • They have emotional intelligence and learn how to manga their emotions effectively.

How To Build Resilience

Fortunately, resilience is something that you can build both in yourself and in your children. There are distinct steps that you can take to become more resilient.

1. Reframe Your Thoughts

Resilient people are able to look at negative situations realistically, but in a way that doesn’t center on blame or brooding over what cannot be changed. Instead of viewing adversity as insurmountable, reframe your thoughts to look for small ways that you can tackle the problems and make changes that will help.

Focusing on the positive things you can do will help you get out of a negative mindset.

You can also use this approach to help children learn how to better cope with challenges. Encourage them to think about challenges in a more positive, hopeful ways. This way, instead of getting stuck in a vicious loop of negative emotions, your child can learn to see these events as opportunities to challenge themselves and develop ow skills.

2. Seek Support

Talking about the difficulties you are coping with doesn’t make them go away, but sharing with a supportive friend or loved one can make you feel like you have someone in your corner, which could help you build your resilience. Discussing tings with other people can also help you better manage the challenges you’re dealing with.

I have a resilience partner – it’s my son. I talk to him everyday and we discuss things that are going on I. Our lives. And bounce things off each other when we have challenges to deal with.

3. Focus On What You Can Control

This is a huge one for some. Their minds automatically go to the things they cannot control. When faced with a crisis or problem, it can beat to get overwhelmed by things that feel far beyond your control. Instead of wishing there is someway you could go back and change things, try focusing only on the things you can directly impact. Encourage your child to develop this skill by talking about their situation and helping them make a plan for how they can react.

Even when the situation seems dire, taking realistic steps can be,p improve it. No matter how small theses steps may be, they can improve you or your child’s sense of control and resilience.

4. Manage Stress

Building healthy stress management habits is a effective way to increase your overall resilience. These habits could include behaviors that help your overall health, like getting enough sleep, and exercise, as well as specific actions you can take during moments of stress, like:

  • Constructive restructuring
  • Breathing exercises
  • Expressive writing
  • Learning biofeedback techniques
  • Practicing effective communication
  • Problem solving
  • Muscle relaxation

With practice these skills can be learned and mastered by adults and children alike. Eventually, you or your child will feel prepared to face stressful situations and be resilient enough to bounce back quickly. If you need he,o learning to keep stress levels under control consider talking to a cognitive therapist.

The Lost And Broken

The left side: Those that witness and minister to the lost and broken about Christ Jesus, the Scriptures and their own testimony. Are those who are walking and being directed by the Holy Spirit daily.

The right side: Those who only go to church on Sundays just to “Feel Good” or to “Be good with the man upstairs,” just like their parents taught them.

Those who Never speak or think of Christ Jesus except to say thank you for giving what I want.

Those that Do Not know the Gospel of Jesus because they Do Not study the Scriptures on their own, So they only say “Jesus is good ,” as if that will change lives.

Characteristics Of Bold People

To be bold is something that many people strive for. It is a admirable personality trait, And it’s a strong one. But what is a bold person? What characteristic do they have? And how can you, yourself, become one?

I’m going to show you all that and more in this post. I will show you just what it means to be bold, and I will tell you about some characteristics you can model yourself after so you can make the necessary steps for becoming bold individual.

Here’s what it means to be bold

To be bold is to laugh in the face of fear. It’s holding your head high and your stride with steadfast stability and purpose. Being bold isn’t just a hobby, it’s a lifestyle and it is embedded deep within everyone, you just have to find it and reach in and pull it out.

More than anything, boldness means letting benefits outweigh the risks and grabbing life by the horns. It’s not letting anything knock you down.

It’s laughing at anxiety and nervousness and trudging forward through life with utmost confidence and courage. It’s also letting your personality shine anyway you please, and ignoring anyone who tries to smirk or sneer at you.

Bold people let things slide off their backs while they focus on walking towards their goals and aspirations. This is what it means to be bold.

Next, we will break it down a bit to highlight some specific traits that are common for bold people to possess.

First of all, everyone is unique but there are certain characteristics of both people that stand out,

Here are some characteristics among bold individuals, see if you identify with any of them.

Confidence

To be bold is to be confident. Own your identity and flaunt it. Don’t let others shoot you down with harsh opinions. Laugh at adversity and be proud of who you are. Hold your head up high and strut your stuff if you want to be bold. The truth is that holding your head up high and being confident will make you feel amazing.

Voice Your Opinion

Don’t hide in the sidelines if you have something you want to speak out about. If there is a pressing issue, give your input and don’t shy away from saying what you feel about what truly matters to you.

Honesty, Even If It’s Brutal

Be honest in everything you do. Don’t hide behind lies or embellishments, because that is a sign of cowardice not boldness. Be bold and say what you truly feel.

Now, this doesn’t mean you shouldn’t insult people. It just means that when someone bothers you or catches your attention, you are honest about it. You also need to be honest to yourself about your own faults, but your boldness helps you overcome them.

Take Pride In Your Achievements

Both people take pride in everything they do because it matters to them. If you accomplish something great be bold, and show it off to the world. Let people know that you care about what you do.

Create Priorities

Keep your priorities straight and don’t let anyone tell you what should be important to you. Both people know that their priorities are tried and true.

Have Clear Goals

Never waver, set goals that matter to you and strive to achieve them. Be bold, don’t let anything knock you away from your goals. The confidence that bold people have in their goals, and their drive to achieve them, is something to be proud of.

Have Rock-Solid Bravery

Bold people never fear for what is to come, what may come, or what has come right in front of them at any given moment. They turn fear into action and vanquish that with seeks to harm them.

Have Immovable Values

Bold people know what their moral values are to the very core. Nothing can shake them From what makes him unique from day today, and no one can change their core values.

Be The Opposite Of Timidity

Bold people are brave in the sight of adversity. They take on challenges with vigor and courage. But they are also not silent or cowardly in anyway. They are the complete and total opposite of such. They speak their minds, face their fears, and move on with more energy than a raging bull.

Have Unabashed Vigor

The vigor of a bold person is unmatched. They have energy that no one can ever challenge, no one likely ever will.

They Make The Most Of Every Moment

Bold people enjoy life to the fullest.Take every minute and cherish it. They take every hour and make the most of it. Every achievement, every relationship, and every second of the day is something precious and something worth sharing.

To truly become A bold person, You must know yourself and build on your strongest qualities. Use this list to find some of those qualities in yourself, and don’t let anyone tell you how to do so. You have to take this on independently and enhance your internal vigor. To be bold you must build upon your strength from the inside out.

You can do this. I feel that if I can do it from the kind of life I have endured that you can do it. Have faith in yourself.

Being bold is a sign of strength, courage, and confidence. If you want to have a rock-hard personality with the strength of an inferno, build upon your bold qualities.

Everyone has the ability to be bold, you just have to dig deep and find it. Look around you and pick out people who you think of as being bold, and model yourself after them if you’d like.

Just take care not to copy others. You don’t want to be someone you’re not, but you do want to identify with those bold qualities and make them your own.

Finally, find your own personal way to enhance yourself and be the bold person I know you can be. You just have to want it.

Do What Scares You The Most

Mark Twain said, “Do the thing you fear the most, and death of fear is certain.” The truth is we are capable of a lot more than we realize. Doubts and fears can be hard to let go of. Most people choose safety over uncertainty. But do safe choices always bring you happiness.

Fear is something that we all experience but, what’s most important is how we respond to it. Fear is a necessary evolutionary response to either physical or emotional danger, it helps us to survive and protect ourselves from real threats that exist in the world. While fear is there to protect us, it can also hold us back, because sometimes we fear things that aren’t actually a threat.

Fear has 3 primary responses; fight, flight of freeze. Each of these reactions can have moments of serving us well when we are in actual danger – but if it’s not a life or death moment, fear can hold us back for no good reason. Sometimes, fear is a learned behavior from watching, (maybe someone in your family was afraid to drive so you developed that same fear. Sometimes we have a fear response from bad experiences, for example a child I feared talking because I was punished for it, I still have fears about speaking in some instances today. I have even been called anti-social because I tend to not talk in certain situations. But I’m learning to push through past this and live life to the fullest. We shouldn’t let our fear hold us back or control us.

We’ve all had moments where our response to fear was freezing, and while it feels right in the instance, I doesn’t help move things forward to get things done. We can run away or take flight, but that won’t help us get things done either.

Mark Twain also said that “Courage is not the absence of fear; it’s acting in spite of it anyway.

So, is there a fourth option to fear:

Embrace the fear and do it anyway

Remember that you will get through it. Things we fear are almost never as bad as we imagine they will be. The worst thing imagine will never come to fruition. We have very powerful imaginations that serve us well in life, but unfortunately, can also hold us back if we let it, we almost “apocalypse it” that’s when our mind goes into the absolute worst thing that can happen, with even acting reasonable. Yes planes can crash, but that doesn’t mean you should stop flying.

The truth is that there’s a possibility that things could go wrong no matter what we do, we can plan everything we imagine and learn about Mother Nature has more imagination than we do. So, instead of letting the possibility of things going wrong hold you back, plan for as much as you can and take the rest as it comes.

We will always wonder “what if.” But regret is a terrible feeling, it’s true that you never get to old, it isn’t true that it’s never to late. The last thing that you want to happen is to get to the end of your life and look back and think “what if” especially when the only thing holding you back was you.

Are You Prone To Overthinking And Worry?

The mind is just like a muscle – the more you exercise it, the strong it gets abs the more it can expand. – Idowu Koyenikan

Are you find in yourself stuck in a cycle of worry and overthinking? It isn’t hard to do these days with everything that’s going on in the world,

Everyday I see people who are overcome with this anxious habit especially those who have doubt and fear.

If you find you stuck in an uncomfortable thought cycle, perhaps worrying about the future or dwelling on the past. It can be like a breakup, it can spiral very quickly, leading to being upset, anxiety, and whole lot of distress.

Often when we go over and over something that is not going to change the outcome or give us anymore control than we already have (or don’t have) and it certainly isn’t any good for your well-being and mental health.

Many of know this, but it’s so easy to get stuck in it.

You are not broken, believe it or not, your thinking style is a habit – so the good news is it can be changed.

I am going to show you some grounding techniques that I have found simple but powerful. Although they do not dive into the deep healing work that is behind many anxious habits they might allow you a moment to get things in order.

What A Grounding Technique?

A grounding technique is a great tool to break the cycle and bring you to the here and now. They help us come back to the current moment and distract you from unhelpful, overwhelmingly thinking patterns.

A therapist I went to shows this to me years ago, I’ve been using it ever since.

By no means are grounding techniques the end of all our problems m but when practiced they are provide the relief you need. Remember, much if your stress and anxiety is being triggered by your thoughts. A grounding technique helps you move away from those thoughts, gives you space before you react and triggers off your relaxation response which is needed in these moments,

These techniques have helped to keep my behaviors in check – especially when I find I am triggered by a sudden change in plans or a shift in circumstances. Grounding myself can be what stops me getting into that irrational stage where I end up doing and saying things I would later regret and be embarrassed about.

When we experience thoughts, moods, and emotions spiraling; choose yo ground yourself. Here are some techniques that I use to receive the best feedback:

  • Name 5 things you can see: a pen, a lamp, or grass.
  • Name 4 things you can feel: wind on your face, your elbow on the table.
  • Name 3 things you can hear: music, traffic, birds singing.
  • Name 2 things you can smell: coffee, flowers.
  • Name 1 thing you like about yourself: you’re independent, you like your smile.

Color Technique

Pick a color of your choice ( I usually start with orange. Look around you and find 5 things of that color. Pick another color and repeat, Do this with a least 5 different colors.

The best thing about these techniques is you can do them any where.

When you are in a moment of distress, it can be really hard to remind yourself to do a grounding technique m or even if you do remember, it can be hard to make yourself actually do it. This is normal, so don’t put high expectations on yourself. At the first point you catch yourself spiraling, this is when you can do the grounding technique. Don’t be to hard on yourself if you don’t catch yourself early, just congratulate yourself when you do.

When you are in the cycle of checking your phone, feeling desperate, and feeling your unhealthy coping strategies creep in, the trick is to bring yourself into reality and see the bigger picture. These techniques may not calm you completely but they may make a difference in you totally acting out.

If during or after practice the grounding technique, you find your mind shifts back to overthinking, that’s okay. You might even feel more relaxed and may think about it clearer and see things from a new perspective. If it continues to spiral, repeat the grounding technique. You can also make them last longer. For example if I’m finding it harder to let go of certain thoughts, I might pick a harder color and look for 10 more things, there are one rules here,nits about what makes you feel better.

Standing On Holy Ground

Where is your place of Holy Ground? It is a place that signals breakthrough.

God has destined in each of our lives a “Holy ground” mo ent in which He will peel back the veil and reveal part of our destiny.

Holy Ground moments have something in common. First, they are rare. We should be praying for moments like these. “God when am I called to do? What is my purpose in life? What is my next step?’

How Not To Miss The Directive Of The Moment

There is a connection historically with the revelation of Holy Ground moment during “Holy Week” (which is April 10- April 16th, 2022), in the Garden of Gethsemane. It was a place of transition and as Jesus went to pray. It was His intersection with destiny in which He had the opportunity to accept or decline what God the Father revealed to Him and requested of Him.

Holy Ground moments are an invitation and revelation. God offers to go into a new place. A “mission impossible” moment if you do what He says, “It is your assignment if you choose to accept it.”

We all have strategic intersections in our lives. These are places and moments that shape our destiny if we will turn and take a closer look and recognize them.

What are the signs we are on Holy Ground?

It is where the natural interacts with the supernatural in a way that is completely unexpected, unexplained and undeniable. When God shows up and reveals a part of your destiny and invites us to take part in it. It won’t make sense. It’s a place where we must make a decision to step into it – or ignore it. There is no middle ground.

We see the term Holy Ground twice in Scripture. First, in Exodus 3 and Acts 7, God brought Moses to the place of the burning bush. He was instructed. “Do not approach here. Remove your sandals from off your feet, for the place on which you are standing is Holy Ground.”

Next, The same phrase is used only one other place in scripture in Joshua 5:15.After Joshua wrote the Israelites across the Jordan to Jericho, he encountered the commander of the army of the lord who said to him, “ remove your sandals from your feet, or the place you are standing on is Holy.

What do you need essences having, and how do they apply to us today? Here’s how to recognize it.

Seven signs you are on Holy Ground:

1. It coincides with a season of Passover and Holy Week Which is next month.

I think it is significant that scripture reveals that Joshua’s encounter coincide with Passover. Did Moses’ as well? If we consider the Garden of Gethsemane A place of Holy Ground… then Jesus’s occurrence was also a Passover.

In the Jewish calendar we are in the month of Nissan, the first month of the new year. Certainly, strategic time. This is a month of new beginnings and we’re firstfruits sets the stage for the entire year. The sacrifice given a first fruits is an offering of ourselves.

Does it mean God only reveals destiny at this time? Not at all. But it does show that there is something special in this window of time in which heaven Invades earth. Be ready.

2. It requires a willingness to look deeper.

When Moses saw the burning bush he didn’t just ask by. Instead he said he said , “ I will now turn and see this great site, why the bush is not burnt.”

His action was the correct response which prompted the Lord’s response.

“ when the Lord saw that he turned to see, god call to him from out of the nest of the bush and said, Moses, Moses“ (Exodus 3:3-4).

It makes you wonder, what if Moses haven’t turned to take a closer look? what if he how determined that he was tired and just wanted to go home? Or if he hadn’t recognized the miracle it was taking place before he died which beckoned to him?

It required a response as Moses chose to go deeper. God always invites us to relationship. It’s all about the journey not just the destination. We must turn to him and look deeper.

3. It was a marker of transition.

Moses and Joshua were in a place of transition during these occurrences. God was inviting them to a new place, a higher place that. God was inviting them to a new place, a higher place that they had not yet envisioned. It was a place of destiny and impartation for them both.

Moses was given a word that he would lead the Israelites out of Egypt. Joshua has just taken over as leader after Moses’s death and was leading the people to the Promised land. It had required that they leave behind who they have been walking to the destiny and purpose that God was revealing. They how do you see themselves in their call and a new way,

They had a decision to make as they stood on Holy Ground as do we.

Do you recognize you have had a Holy Ground moment?

4. It was a place of assignment.

In each case there was an assignment to be given to accomplish a task that was beyond their skill and natural ability. That’s the thing about Holy Ground it is beyond anything we can do in ourselves. It requires a choice and decision. It is no different than the contestants on a game show. “Let’s make a Deal,” as God says, “There are two doors before you, but you can’t really see were either leads…” We Know without a shadow of a doubt one choice will be a fabulous destination, Well the other will be something average or even below average.

The good news is God actually tells us which door to choose. He doesn’t want to trick us. He points the way to the right choice.

Yeah it’s still not easy is it? Abraham was told to go to the place he had never been before. No one was told to build an ark, when it had never rained. Joshua was told that the way to conquer a city where she walk around it once each day for six days and seven times on the seventh day with the worshipers, the Levites leading the way.

Holy ground moments won’t make sense you’re a natural mind

5. It involves a “passing over” we’re passing through.”

To reach another place requires action. We can pray. We can wait. And we can even whine. But eventually we have to move.

During Passover the angel of death “passed over” go to his home had the blood of the Passover lamb brush up on their door posts, so we must pass over or through from one place to the next when we come to a Holy Ground moment.

6. It requires humility.

Moses and Joshua were required to remove your sandals. Shoes were a symbolic significance. The act of taking off a hue in those days were used as a seal to bind an agreement. It was also a place to “undress”or be dispossessed. Bookcases apply for as Moses and Joshua obeyed the instruction to remove your sandals, they showed agreement I said down themselves to the word of destiny and displaced/removed themselves from their past.

They were choosing a new road, when they couldn’t walk successfully on their own.

7. It hinged on worship.

Joshua and the Israelites were instructed to shout a shout of joy and victory. It was a prophetic act done before they saw their victory, )an anticipation of victory) after they walked around the walls of Jericho for seven days. Moses was told after the Israelites were delivered they would return to the mountain and the Lord is the worship. It is a place where we worship before God and build an altar of remembrance afterwards.

Holy Ground moments are rare

They are moments when God pushed back the veil Reveal something about us that we have not yet seen in ourselves. We may experience them only once or twice in our lives. But they are they are. For everyone. That’s moment cannot be explained, understood, or denied. God shows up and we are changed – If we choose.

It requires that we knew before Him to except the path He has revealed, even when it is usually only a piece of the puzzle. It will require enormous faith and trust Along road we have never been before. It will look impossible. And it is without God.