Being Offended Is Not A Virtue

It seems like people are more offended in the world today, everything we say or do offends people.

Part of the problem is how good it feels to be the offended party. Expressing your offense let’s you feel heard and powerful. It makes it clear that you and everyone else around that you are righteous and that your opinion is the proper one. When someone tries to counter your offense by explaining the reasonableness of their position, our default mode kicks in to feel all the more validated in our offense. If they need to defend themselves then we must be right.

The problem with being offended

Expressing your offended ness doesn’t change anything. It just sets in stone both parties more firmly in their view points. On top of that being the offended party tends to put you in the position to be a victim, which is overly contrary to how Jesus demonstrated his people to operate.

Let’s not be people who are easily offended. Let’s be “quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.

Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends

Proverbs 17:9

Proverbs 19 goes on to say that it’s a person’s glory to overlook an offense. If you want to be a loving, glorious person, stop being so offended.

We need to be a people who operate with humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love.

Hate does not add up to Love. Hate creates hate. I cannot phantom the idea that anyone thinks like this.

It will always be like John Dickerson said “United We Stand, divided we fall.

Good will always Triumph over Evil.

Light overcomes darkness.

It is very disturbing to me that parents don’t teach their children this. And teachers don’t teach this in their class.

Secrets To Getting Along With People You Can’t Stand.

No matter where your at getting along with people you’re surrounded by can be challenging at best. The inability to get along with others we may not like can have a huge impact on our future. It might be a co-worker or it might be the tension with an in-law (or three) that adds undue stress to your important relationships.

In business it may be that you aren’t getting along with your boss. At best, this can make your day-to-day work unpleasant, but this could also have a negative impact on your career as a whole. Learning to communicate and get along with others is vital to our success.

Even though I don’t get along with my mother-in-law. She has completely different views and value system than me. I have to be around her sometime. sometimes.

Getting along with people you don’t like doesn’t imply defeat, giving in or compromise, it’s a ways getting through life without constantly banging your head against the wall and being miserable in situations where you could, at the very least, be at ease.

There are three ways you can along with people you don’t like. Here they are:

Take a look in the mirror

The first step to getting along with others is knowing that you can’t change anyone but yourself. It doesn’t do any good to try and change anyone. The fact is that you will most likely make things worse. And trying to make someone change their behavior is nothing less than manipulation; and who likes being manipulated?

If there is something that someone does on a regular basis that gets on your last nerve, take a look in the mirror and consider that this behavior might be something that you engage I. And aren’t particularly proud of. We’ve all done things or act in ways that we’re not happy with. When we see others act similarly this might cause for us to lash out or contend with this person. It’s been found that one of the main reasons people lash out is to renew a sense of confidence.

Next time that person does something to tick you off, pause and ask yourself if what they did is really that bad or just something that hits close to home regarding your own patterns.

The Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.

Bob Marley

Avoid trigger topics

There’s a good reason that you don’t discuss politics or religion at a dinner party. These are sensitive topics and people tend to have very strong opinions about them. I’ve seen people get into bitter arguments because they sit on opposite sides of the fence politically speaking. (Actually I’ve been in some bitter arguments about this.) suddenly one’s accusing the other of lacking sensitivity because they voted for someone because they voted for someone they didn’t like.

Five minutes earlier they were laughing and joking together and now they’re making comments they can never can take back.

But it’s not just politics or religion that might set someone off. Anything from how to raise kids to what you should be eating and anything in between that can start an argument. Especially when tension already exists in a relationship.

We’ve all been guilty of intentionally pushing someone’s buttons and we know what it’s like for someone to push ours. You know exactly what to say to get someone’s goat. It might even be amusing but, it’s only creating more and more tension in the relationship.

If you want to start getting along with someone you usually can’t stand being around, consider the topics you argue over and avoid them if possible. Start taking note of some common ground you have and focus there instead.

Never above you. Never below you. Always beside you.

Walter Winchell

Stay clear of social media

There are certainly benefits to social media, but social media platforms like Facebook and Twitter can be breeding grounds for intense debates. I’ve seen people display their worst side on social media. Maybe it’s because they feel isolated since they aren’t engaging in face to face conversations. It’s easy to share your political views or lash out at someone because of theirs when you’re sitting behind a computer or mobile device. And it just breeds anger in to your life. And Lord knows we don’t need anymore of that.

If you have someone in your life you’re rather not be around, then why are you following them on social media? It’s simple to block content and unfollow someone on any social media platform. Continuing to tweet and comment with or about people you don’t like only adds to stress.

So, if you’re ready to get along better with people you don’t like then follow these three steps. Not on,y will you have a better time being around them, you might even find enough common ground to enjoy their company. You can at least start by tolerating them, but it will never happen without effort on your part.

Four Emotional Types

Your emotional types is the filter through which you both see the world-the default setting of your personality to which you revert to especially when your under stress.

Emotional Type #1:

The Intellectual. You are bright, articulate, analytic, intellectually oriented, and often take refuge in your mind as the first line of coping.

Upside:Extremely logical, comfortable with fixing problems logically and intellectually, great debater, able to stay calm in emotionally heated situations.

Downside: Difficulty connecting with feeling-other’s and your own; you give the impression of being snobby, withholding, or cold; obsess about problems and sometimes you are too serious.

Finding the Balance: Spend more time in your physical/sensual self. Try breathing techniques, vigorous exercise, and practicing feeling other people’s emotion, empathize.

Emotional Type #2

The Empath. You are highly sensitive, naturally giving, spiritually attuned, and a good listener.

Upside: Gifted healer, helper, and friend; passionate and sensual; intuitive about other’s thoughts and feelings; emotionally responsive; in touch with your body and emotions.

Downside: Easily absorb other’s negativity; prone to anxiety, depression, and fatigue; easily feel confined when living with other’s; difficulty setting boundaries with draining people.

Finding the Balance: Use positive self-talk and logic to get grounded. Allow frequent quiet and meditation time. Learn to set clear limits and boundaries-say no, take space, walk away, and always protect yourself.

Emotional Type #3

The Rock: You are emotionally strong for yourself and other’s, practical, able to stay cool in crisis, your nonjudgmental.

Upside: Pillar of strength, consist and loyal, giving, respectful, and get along with nearly everyone.

Downside: Can be detached from feelings; harbor anger and frustration; relationships may lack depth; you don’t make waves or invite challenges and rather avoid conflict than confront it.

Finding the Balance: Practice activities that are spontaneous. Express a feeling a day. Initiate conversations that are emotional.

Emotional Type #4

The Gusher. You know your emotions and share them often, and are spontaneous, direct, and authentic.

Upside: Emotionally articulate, easily forgiving, make and keep supportive networks of friends, value intimate relationships, process hard issues easily.

Downside: You tend to eat drama king or queen, may turn friends into therapists, seek external feedback rather than relying on you own intuition, excessive need to share,

Finding the Balance: Practice activities the support and strengthen your self-sufficiency. Give yourself credit, learn to forgive yourself, and practice positive self-talk.

The Gift Of Thoughts

While thoughts can be a gift, some thoughts are intrusive. And cause you to live in agony. I know first hand how miserable it is to suffer from anxiety. But I also know that when you turn toward anxiety and see it as a messenger delivering vital information from your inner world. It can help you heal and transform your life. You shift from hating anxiety and trying to make it go away to being able to turn toward it and learn from it. Then your healing on you.

If your struggle with intrusive thoughts you’re in a hell-realm of mental agony. A thought arrives, you hook it to that thought immediately and you’re in for the nightmare ride of your life time descending into the underworld of a type of panic that only a intrusive thought can inspire.

All of us get intrusive thoughts for You might have asked yourself: What if I’m gay? or would if I have a terminal illness? What if I don’t love my partner? The thoughts that come after that are the cycle.

When you understand this cycle, you can snap yourself out of it and easily start to put the fire out.

A cycle runs like this: An intrusive thought enters your mind. Would if I don’t love my husband anymore? You’ll feel a sense of panic and your upper stomach begins to roll, the tightness in your thought then a cold chill. You hook in immediately an try to find some answers. You obsess would if my husband is cheating on me I have to have proof. What if he doesn’t love ME anymore. You check his belongs so through all his stuff seeking reassurance. Talk with your spouse about it. Tell him how to feel and work on it.

When we indulge in the addiction to our intrusive thoughts. Trying to find reassurance for every thought that goes through you mind you are sunk. You dive deep into anxiety. It can take hours, days or even weeks to snap out of the cycle.

The essential piece of work to heal from your intrusive thought patterns is to learn to establish a new habit. When an intrusive thought enters your mind learn to disengage from it. You feed the when you urge yourself to find answers and reassurance,. You’ve give your ego-driven mind exactly what it wants, the belief that you can find the answer. You Usually find yourself in misery and pain because there is no answer.

Intrusive thoughts only point to unanswerable questions. We don’t have crystal balls to tell us the future. The loving parent, the part of you that can offer reassurance and comfort, needs to take over and step in at the point and and say something like it doesn’t matter. There are no definite answers. And move on with you life.

Your ego will be agitated like crazy, but you don’t have to sit in a pool of discomfort. You’re ego will always demand an answer and try and use every reason possible to convince you that to need to find certainty, when what you really need to focus on love a and attention. Give yourself the attention you need say s like “I’ll deal with later or that’s a ridiculous thought that doesn’t make sense at all.” Give your inner self some comfort that you will listen to.

Intrusive thoughts are thoughts with a symptom. Ask yourself what am I needing. Instead of thinking thought than run you into the ground. As for my husband I needed some love and some time with him.

Intrusive thoughts are the self’s attempt to get your attention. And with there focus on alarming topics, like health, love, they certainly get your attention. Once the thought had your attention you need to unhook from the thought and focus your mind on what you really need. Focus your attention of getting to know yourself and the way you need to go.

Are You Double Minded?

Have you ever thought about being double mindedness looks like.

In James 1 says, But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavers is like a wave of the sea driven by the wind and tossed here and there. For let not the man think that he shall receive anything of the Lord.

A Double-Minded man is unstable in all his ways.

Jesus

I often think we overlook the weight of this. I was shocked the first time I heard someone speaks of it. Even though I had read the Bible I missed that part.

Many of us have been or still are double-minded but fail to recognize it in ourselves.

Double-minded means one is wavering, uncertain, doubting. It is to have divided interest.

If you are double- minded you are unsteady, faithless and changeable in everything they say or do. You can get nothing from the Lord if you are.

If you are double-minded you can talk faith today and lack faith tomorrow. You can encourage others that God will help them but, regarding yourself, God never honors your requests. Such individuals often have a “but” ready when confronted with the truth of Scripture. Why is this?

The Double-minded are:

  • Led by there emotions/feelings
  • Led by their own understanding
  • Led by what they see
  • Led by the dictates of man/society

There can be a number of reasons causing one to be double-minded. Neglecting to assemble together with true believers. I believe another cause is lack of understanding. Being separated from the body is dangerous for a believer.

Most the time when someone mentions double- mindedness they just call it doubt: “if you doubt you are double- minded,” it is seldom explained just how subtle double-mindedness can be. It is something we all have to guard against no matter how long your a believer.

For example: Your mother-in-law is coming to town and emotions want your, weary in a perfect position for double-mindedness to creep in. Emotions are high, perhaps a little anxiety starts to set in and before we know it we’ve become soft in the head and loose at the lips and we say stupid things we will regret later. God is not to blame ever. I’ve heard people say that faith inGod doesn’t work. Letting emotions run away with your mouth cause us to be reckless with our words.

Is it not unreasonable speech for a man at midnight to say, it will never be day? It is unreasonable for a man in trouble to say, O Lord, I shall never get free; it will always be

Thus.

Richard Sibbles

If we think of double-mindedness as a lack of real trust in God. Have you ever thought about the ways we cultivate double-mindedness?

Think about it you pray for a job you really wanted, you get the job and your happy and thankful for the job, but then you grow accustomed to it’s d suddenly the job isn’t so great anymore, there’s co-workers that don’t do their jobs, there’s frustration with the conditions. You can’t seethe blessing of having the job in the first place.

Think about those times we become impatient or worried things won’t ever work out. Do you just have faith and trust God, or do you just struggle with unbelief.

Think about how you deal with what God blessed you with. Do you give credit to God in your church circles just to treat your blessings like the are worthless when you think no one’s looking? Your being double-minded.

Even with God do you trust only with strings attached? I used to do this so much. “If you bless me playing bingo so I can win I’ll give you 20% of what I win.” Bad move, not only did I not win, but the conviction that comes after it was horrible.

I know people who have come close to losing their child from a incurable deceases. The Doctors said their child only has 3 weeks to live, they prayed and prayed to God, to save their child, the child made a turn for the better their child showing no signs of the decease. And two months later their partying it up with no mind of anything that happened. If that happened to me and my child I would be fully in debt to God.

God is trustworthy, wonderful and worthy to be praised.

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Strategies The Enemy Uses To Keep You Defeated

Do you have a plan to counterattack the strategies the enemy uses to keep you defeated? Don’t let Satan catch you off guard- You can defeat the enemy every time.

If you know anything about the military you know a unit would never dream of going to war without a battle plan. A battle plan is a strategy to exploit your enemies weaknesses and to maximize your strengths so you can win. If you don’t know anything about the military, perhaps you’ve never thought you needed a battle plan. You do because we all have a spiritual enemy, Satan, who has waged wars against you.

In Colossians 2:15 it states the Jesus has already defeated Satan for us but that doesn’t mean Satan isn’t going to use strategies to try and trick us into believing otherwise. His strategies are intended to keep us defeated and take everything that is rightfully ours.

Some Christians say: The enemy is already defeated, then lie down and take a whipping. If we have no responsibility to stand our ground against the enemy’s schemes then why did God tell us to resist the devil. He would have no need to give us authority over all the power of the enemy.

I suffered from depression, anxiety and suicidal tendencies. For 20 plus years. I thought it was just the way things we were meant to be. There was no way out of it, the medication the Doctors gave me just didn’t work or made things worse. I would take the medication as prescribed and end up in the hospital every few weeks for overdoses. How can you take medicine the doctors give to and be overdosed?

No medication and I suffered endlessly. It wasn’t until I began to fight with all my heart and soul that things started to change. If you want the enemy to leave you alone fight and never give up.

Satan uses his strategies to try and steal kill and destroy. Many of us take light of our opponent.

You need to have a battle plan so Satan won’t outsmart you become familiar with his evil schemes. The military calls this intelligence.

God has given us all the intelligence we need to keep Satan under our feet. Psalm 144:1 says that He trains our hands for war. He reveals the enemy’s strategies, and then tells us the plan of counterattack.

Don’t let Satan catch you off guard. Be prepared. Below are four strategies that Satan uses to keep you defeated and how to launch a counterattack and win.

1.) Satan Instills fear. (Timothy 1:7). Fear is Satans primary weapon. It’s a spiritual war that begins inside you, and it’s totally destructive because it robs you of your faith and peace. It keep your focus on circumstances instead of the promises in God’s word.

That’s why the Bible commands 110 times to fear not. healing for his daughterit’s why Jairo’s needed healing for his daughter and the circumstance didn’t look good. Jesus was quick to instruct him, “ don’t be afraid just have faith and he will be healed. (Luke 8:50). Jesus was warning Jairus of the greatest enemy to his greatest enemy to his daughter’s healing fear.

The enemy instills fear by challengingThe promises of God. A great example of this is found in Matthew 14 when Jesus invited Peter to come to Him on the water. But when Peter saw the strong wind and waves, he was terrified and began to sink. Save me, Lord he shouted.

What enable Peter to walk on the water? His faith in the word of Jesus. What caused Peter to sink? He saw the strong wind and waves that defeated him it was his fear of them.

The counterattack for fear.

Meditate on Gods word, this is how faith that drives out fear is developed. The word of God is the sword of the Spirit.

Speak the word of God. Use it to fight something every time he comes against you. Hold up your shield of faith and Quinn all his fiery darts. Speak words of faith and fear will depart.

Rebuke fear. Whenever you feel fear trying to come on you don’t stand it for a moment say fear I rebuke you in Jesus’s name now go.

Pray in the spirit. Whenever you tempted to be in fear, anxiety, or worry, begin immediately to pray in the spirit. It will edify your inner man and bring you peace that exceeds understanding.

2) The enemy liar and is the father of lies. (John 8:44)

One of the strategic schemes of the enemies is to lie to you every day. “Your stupid you’ll never amount to anything.” Do you ever have negative and discouraging thoughts that come out of nowhere? Sometimes They can be hard to recognize the enemies right because they sound like they could be true. However if you except him as truth or leave them even for a moment the ball onto Satan’s tactics giving him the upper hand.

The enemy knows your insecurities he plays on them. He knows the fears to fight you again and he tried his best to feed them by telling you guys. The question is: why does he like to you? What does he get out of it? The answer is this access to your life. He has come “to kill and steal and destroy” (John 10:10.) and if he can get you into wrong thinking wrong leaving wrong saying and wrong acting, the door to your life is wide open to him.

So if you have thoughts opposite of what God says- thoughts like your aren’t good enough to be healed, delivered, saved, prosperous, full of joy, full of peacem full of hope or powerful in the kingdom of God- know they are outright lies straight from the pit of hell.

No one can afford the “luxury” of entertaining the enemy’s,it’s. There is to much at stake. Your health, your family, your relationships, your money. Don’t let Satan become your counselor in the areas of life that matter the most. He is the Father of lies and our greatest enemy. And what’s trying to Destroy America right now.

Take every thought captive. Start lining up every thought with the words of God. It says in the Bible Gods sheep know His voice so when you hear something that is contrary to God’s word it’s speaking lies take those lies captive and throw them to the ground before they ever have a chance to take root.

Respond with the truth. You can’t fight back with box so it’s important to speak gods truth when the enemy lies. For example if Satan says “you are not smart enough to do that job,” you answer back oh yes I am Satan. For it is written that I have the mind of Christ.

3) going to meet temp you to sin. Let no one say when he is tempted I am tempted by God for God cannot be tempted by evil nor does he himself tempt anyone. -James 1:13.

God will never tempt you to do anything that is wrong. In fact He has given you every tool to resist Satan so will flee from you. Satan tempts you to sin and no one is exempt.

Has Satan ever tempted you?

Sometimes it’s obvious about it telling you to lie or human action immortality or another sin clearly defined as such in God’s word. But a lot of times, he’s sucker than that. For example, he may tempt you to think your holier than others or that your doing others a favor by judging and exposing people. You might even start thinking more about your own feelings, needs, and desires than those of others.

A few years ago I was at a worship and prayer meeting, my church had people visiting. Right before it was over I said something about the word of God in front of the group. This visitor said to me. You don’t have it right! I tried to tell him the scripture it was from. But he just walked away. I left feeling very angry, by the time I reached my home I was angry at the entire church, my pastor, his wife, and everyone that went there. It got to the point I was going to leave the church and find another, I live in a small community, so I was believing that everyone would here what happen, so I would have to stop completely. By the time the morning I was angrier than ever.

Then I stopped. I thought why would someone from out of town, come to my church and downgrade me in front of everyone. It didn’t make sense. I knew it was Satan trying to attack me. I began to pray and seek God’s answer. After about 3 day’s I was able to share this with a small prayer meeting I went to during the week, they were naturally shocked this would even happen.

The next Sunday I spoke to the pastor and his wife. The said it was a direct attack from the enemy. I few weeks later I shared what happened with the entire church.

In Matthew 4:11 Satan pulled out all the stops when a Jesus was in the wilderness. He tried to get Jesus to abandon the path of obedience and keep Him from what God had sent him to accomplish.

Is this what kinda of what happened to me. I decided then and there Satan was not going to stop me from accomplishing what God sent me to do.

From a troubled childhood, to depression and oppression, and having Cancer. Satan has tried to stop and destroy me. Why? I’m pretty sure I have a purpose here. I my not know how it will end. But I will be in God’s hands, no Satan’s.

The greatest danger in a believer’s life is to think you are above temptation. That when you’ve let your guard down, taken off your armor, and assumed your work is done. Remember Satan can sneak in the tiniest crack. Just when you least expect it he will strike. Be ready to fight.