Keep Your Head High Up.

Keep Your Head High No Matter What Happens. You’ll Be Alright. If The Moment Hurts, Do Not Fall Victim To Its Pain. Look Ahead. Focus On Dreams. You’ll make it.

So you spilled your cup of coffee on your white shirt before walking into an important meeting. And last night, that text message you sent off never got read, when you were really were counting on a response. and to top off just how great your week has been going, your on the way to get lunch and your check engine light comes on, you had a mechanic look at it over the weekend and he said everything was fine.

Alright the things listed above are hypothetical, however they are absolutely not impossible. You can have those off days. It could be more or less harsh than to spilled coffee or a car issue. Maybe you lose your phone or your keys, maybe you’ll lose a family member of friend. Life happens. But the beautiful thing about it is that, no matter what you go through today or tomorrow or next week or in the next 5 years and so on. You have the power to control your attitude towards it all.

I know it’s superficial to always here “don’t worry, everything will be ok” and “there’s people who have it worse.” You want someone to genuinely understand you and see you as an individual but sometimes it doesn’t work out that way. But, don’t worry, your feelings and emotions and the thing’s you have experienced aren’t overlooked completely. You matter. I might not know who you are or where you are, I want you to know from one human to another who’s been through a lot to another.

Breath because you can. Look in the mirror for a few moments and remind yourself how many things you’ve made it through. And you are still here. You’re strong. I know things don’t go the way you want them to. I can relate. But the way life goes is the way it’s going to go, no matter what, accept it and let go of the fear of what might happen next.

Embrace that you’re more than your anger and sadness and you are definitely much more than dwelling on the past and the things you cannot change.

If you have a bad day, make it better by listening to your favorite music or calling someone you love ( not to complain but to have them lift you up.) Maybe talking to someone if just what you need in that moment.

Having Intention

We live in a world of intense distraction, where multitasking is commonplace. And the results have been predictable. We have trouble focusing and managing time. People who are the best time managing time. People who are the best time managers know how to focus, do what they do, and move on to the next task. When you do too many things at once, gets nothing done.

When we are not able to focus, we are lacking intention. What is intention? Intention is mentally giving direction to something- like determining the perferred outcome of a goal. Intention is knowing what you want from an activity. It is where the drive to focus and execute the activity stems from. You cannot focus without directing your attention to one thing intensely one thing that you approach with purpose.

Having Small-Scale Intention

In order to have intention on a small scale, such as approaching a single task or project with direction and a goal in mind. You must define what you do accept in your process, and what you do not. Avoiding what is unnecessary is a key part of having intention. For example: if you’re intention is to ask your boss for a raise, you would go into the meeting with your boss prepared to sell your accomplishments to him or her. You would avoid bringing up conflicts with coworkers and you shortcomings as an employee.

Having Marco-Scale Intention

The principle above are applicable to the scale of your entire life. Intention is the first link between knowing what your life to be like and actually living that life. The second link that follows intention is action. What is your vision for what you want in your life? What don’t you want? For example: if you intend to have a happy healthy marriage, you would set your mind on being loving, communicating well, being respectful, and having a shared life purpose. You would exclude any kind of abuse in your relationship. Another example: You want to be a good person, and you would exclude negative activities that distract you from bringing our your fundamental goodness.

Ahurde that people encounter with good or “pure” intentions Is that the desire to do something positive is there, but the results are thwarted by negative events. That’s why it is so vital to exclude what you don’t want when you’re trying to set and act on positive intention. If you protect your intentions like you’d protect a small child from harm,you’ll be more likely to succeed at actualizing them.

Stop Trying To Calm The Storm. Calm Yourself, The Storm Will Pass

Everyone’s been there. In the midst of an argument when things get serious. Heated words are exchanged. One thing leads to another, and before long your ready to tear out each other’s hair.

We think of confrontation as an aggressive thing but it shouldn’t be a defensive maneuver of a counterattack. A healthy, fruitful confrontation is marked by empathy, calm and commitment. Also a smidgen of hostility. Unless you’re from some kind of guru, you’re likely to have some trouble shifting back down to neutral after one of those arguments.

Learning how to regain your composure is more that personal development. Losing your cool in the workplace can cost you your career.

Here are some ways to channel more positive energy:

Walk Away

It’s the oldest trick in the book, but it works. It can help both people and helps balance your environment. But wait until the other person says everything they want to say.

Clear Your Mind

After you have walked away from a argument, stretch yourself with a walk in the fresh air. Push all the negative words that the person said and replace it with positive memories such a a good weekend or a recent gathering with friends. This kind of neurological substitution can really works wonders. If your walk takes you to a quiet place, consider having a brief break and re-center yourself.

Engage In Another Task. Sometimes emerging yourself in a new effort is the best way to calm down. Calm your nerves by vigorously working to attain a reasonable goal.

A Few Words About Empathy. You have to be clear. But there are two kinds of clarity. The first kind is easy. “I feel this way.” That’s clear if somewhat unhelpful. The second kind takes a little more work. “ I believe that you feel this way.” That’s empathy. And empathy changes everything. The whole idea of any kind of conflict management is to understand why the person is doing what they’re doing that’s driving you crazy. You can often solve the problem or learn to tolerate it or generate a work-around. Try to cool down a bit. Take a breath. Now check your assumptions. Try to see things from another perspective.

Ask yourself if you’ve had and role in the offending behavior, even indirectly. Could it possibly be true that your own actions have contributed to the behavior you’re objecting to.

What Are The Spiritual Disciplines?

I added 12 spiritual disciplines that lists 12 disciplines that are created to become closer to God.

Spiritual Discipline is defined as “training expected to produce a specific character or pattern of behavior. Discipline is not part of the sin nature, but it is a natural component of the Christian life. Almost nothing of any significance in our lives is ever accomplished with out it.

Self-disciplines can be described as those behaviors that augment our spiritual growth and enable us to grow to spiritual maturity. This process of spiritual growth and development begins to take place the moment a person encounters the risen Christ and comes to Him for salvation.

The Characteristics Of A Truly Good Person

One usually knows whether a person is good by what they do.

Kind, helpful, understanding, patient, and loving are some of the words that come to mind when asked to list the qualities of a good person. One usually knows a person it good by what they do.

They never remember the angry or holding grudges of anyone. They are always there reaching out to help others. They are the purest souls around us. Never leave them because they deserve to be treasured and loved.

Characteristics Of A Truly Good Person:

They can never stay mad at you. They are truly magical beings and always forgiving other’s mistakes.

They are like a “Fun Booster, in a gloomy or dull situation. Especially when your feeling blue. A hug from then is all you need.

When you succeed, their happiness for you is legitimate. They’ll be the first one to demand a car ride in your new ca or ask for a night out when you get that promotion.

You will never notice a frown on they face. They are always very cheerful. N9 wonder you haven’t noticed crow feet on their face yet.

They have a gentle heart Yet the are so brave. That’s why things never break their hearts. They won’t even confront and go all dramatic instead, just walk away silently. Like nothing ever happened.

They never nag or grumble about their own problems. And that’s what makes them the best company to have.

Helping and caring for others seems like what they were born for. Is the car at the repair shop? Don’t worry, the next thing you know, they’ll be there honking near you place just to give you a lift.

They are warm-hearted people. The value of friendship or relationships they have. And they are not stupid enough to initiate a fight over some negligible issue.

When they’re sad themselves, all you can do is give them a nice hug. And bam! Their cheerful smile will be back once again.

You would think they don’t even have a dark side. It’s extremely hard to tell, you’ll hardly see then yelling, shouting or picking a fight for reason. They are not manipulative and cunning.

They always Emit such positive vibes. Starting from their smile to there body language. They is something so different and positive about them, you’ll always want them as your friend.

Being Tested Throughout Your Life

This last week have been a rough go for me. It’s been almost the entire month of April. It’s gone from a horrible migraine headaches to my sodium level dipping dangerously low and a week in the hospital. To blood work every 4 hours for 3 days. My arms look like black and blue pin cushions. I was diagnosed with brain lesions caused from severe chronic migraines. And while the doctors were doing CT-Scans to MRI’s they found a tumor in my artery in my neck. This artery that my carotid artery is twisted around. The doctor’s want to get a biopsy, but aren’t sure how to go about it. It’s very risky. If they nick my carotid artery I’m as good as dead.

I have been a very strong woman most of my life. But, now I’m not certain I’m going to win this one.

It’s been all I can think about since last week. So there was no use trying to write an article for my blog today.

I completely trust my God, but it’s scary to think that I could be close to death with this surgery.

I know I need to buck up and be strong to get through this once and for all. Before it takes my voice or my sight.

I know I have to get the biopsy done and get this tumor out, and I need to be strong now more than ever.

Why Fear Is A Lie

Discovering the truth behind anxiety and worry, and set yourself free.

If your life is dominated by anxiety and worry fear has been telling you two things.

1. Terrible things are going to happen: You’re going to fail, people won’t like you, your loved ones are In Danger, you will lose your health.

2. You won’t be able to handle it: You’ll be overwhelmed, alone and unable to cope.

I’m writing this because I almost let fear take me over recently. I was diagnosed with a mass in the artery of my neck. It is very close to my carotid artery and is sitting on a bunch of nerves that control my voice box and my sight.

My first fear was that I could go blind or lose the ability to speak. Then to top it off I realized when the remove it, there is a chance they will nick my carotid artery and I could bleed to death.

Scary thoughts, I almost began to cry, but that would change anything.

I know I’ve trusted God on hard trials before. And he has never failed me yet.

In cognitive behavior therapy they call these predictions:

The likeliness estimates the probability that our fear will come true

Severity especially: how bad it will be if it actually happens.

I want to look more closely at each of these forecasts.

Likelihood Estimates

You probably know from experience that fear exaggerates the likelihood of bad things happening. Years ago I was diagnosed with cancer it weighed heavy on my mind, just a few years before my cousin died from the same type of cancer. Not to mention my cancer doctor told me I had 1 year to live. And I’d better start planning my funeral. I was scared already then he told me this. Yes I had a tremendous fear I was going to die.

It was a realization come to me. I saw a whole sequence of tragic events. The diagnosis, the hospital stay, my family holding bedside vigils and the devastating loss of my life.

Mark Twain supposedly said “I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.”

Studies show that about 9 outfoxed 10 worries are false alarms. So 90% of the time, your fear is lying to you about the bad things that will happen.

Interestingly enough I was diagnosed with a clean bladder and no sign of cancer in my body. I tell people God healed me, and I truly believe He did. How else would a woman who was given 1 year to live, have a clean cancer check with no signs the cancer was even there.

As with my mass, yes, there is a concern, but in all actuality, the surgeon will have steady hands or God will take me home. I already know where I’m going. And I’m positive that it’s not my time is still not up.

Sometimes the things we’re worried about actually happen. I once worried my son’s severe rash was a tell, tell sign he was allergic to something. And it actually happened. He was allergic to soy, and eggs and milk. He had to be fed goats milk as a baby.

So would about the severity- when what we’re afraid of materializes, is it as bad as we expect?

Severity Estimates

When you pay close attention to your fears, you’ll probably notice that the predicted outcome is always worse than bad. If your worried about getting sick on vacation, it’s going to be terrible. If your late for a meeting it will be awful. If you lose your job, life will be over. In one way or another you won’t be able to handle what you fear.

The issue is that our imagination doesn’t look far enough into the future. We stop at the point at which our fears come true. It’s as though we’ll meet a cliff, and the bad thing that might happen will be the end of the story.

My example about my son, I stopped at the point where he would be Scarred for life. Not realizing that he would grow out of these, or learn to cope with the rashes and know how to avoid the things he was allergic to.

What Is Fear?

Think about a time when one of your fears came true. You probably were unhappy about it, and then moved into problem-solving mode. With my son I stopped using eggs when I cooked, I bout him goats milk to put in his bottles. I ready the labels on everything. If it had soy we as a family didn’t eat it. It turned out to be a problem I could deal with.

If we keep looking at our fears, we would see ourselves handling what comes our way. No matter what happens, there will always be the next thing we need to do, until the end of life, at which there is nothing left to fear anyway. You’ve already handled countless problems to get to this point in your life and none of them were the end of the story. But, each one of them we’re tasks that needed to be attended to.

This is not to say that none of the problems you run into will be a big deal. Sometimes the bad thing that happens is a very, very big deal. But, it won’t be what your fear is telling you it will be. It will still be in your life. It will still be in your life, doing what you can respond to what has happened.

You’ll also have the love and the support of those who care about you, which your fear leaves out of the picture.